The Kaparaz Family

winding down semester break

2012-01-13T14:02:00.002-05:00

So, this girl ends her first semester of grad school with a 4.0 GPA :) Yeah, I was pretty happy about that. Now it's up to me to maintain that for the next 2 years...and a scholarship that pushes me even more to maintain it. I have a feeling it's not going to be easy...darn tootin'. But I'm bound and determined to keep it up and study my butt off for a course of study I really love. The new semester starts on the 23rd, Chinese New Year's Day, so I've got one more week of slacking :) But I'll be substituting, so far, 3 1/2 days next week, so that's great.

Meantime, I've been enjoying some reading (Noel Hynd's Russian Trilogy, The Help), some movies (Raul's Christmas present The Smurfs, dad's Christmas present Ben Hur, my Christmas present West Side Story's 50th anniversary), and Boy Meets World dvd marathons with Raul. We're on season 4 now, and I think I love the show more now than I did when it was first on tv. Such a great show. I helped Raul pass his driver's test this past Wednesday (woohoo!). We submitted more paperwork for his visa. We hunted for jobs for him...to no avail thus far, but we continue to look and pray. Meanwhile, Raul is taking 2 more courses this semester in anticipation of going to a PTA program in Florida, which brings me to... we continue to pray about the Florida move.

Please continue to pray with us. I still have no idea how this is going to work, and I pray that God will reveal more to us as we go along, especially as we prepare for our spring break trip to Florida in March. There is so so much to be done in order to make this work, and I'm getting pretty anxious. Not to mention the fact that it can't happen at all if Raul's visa isn't approved. Many people have asked me why we have to go through it in the first place (I think I've said this before), and I tell them that though I loathe the process, I understand why it's in place. You just have to do what you can and pray that it's enough. We know in our hearts that we married for the right reasons, that God brought us together, and we have every intention of staying together no matter what happens. Now it's up to the powers that be to see that as well. So please pray that they do, and in a timely manner...no clue how long it will be until we hear something.

So that's where we are in this first month of the new year.

Welcome 2012!

2011-12-31T09:22:00.004-05:00

One of my favorite things about being a part of the Nanjing International Christian

Fellowship (and there were many!) was the watch night service on New Year's Eve. My first one back in 2004/2005 left me with no voice the next day :) Our last one, we were dumb enough to take a picture of ourselves at 1AM. Some awesome memories of ringing in the new year with people from all over the world. And this year, I hear they're not holding the watch night service, the first time I think in a very long time they won't be celebrating together. Sad.

We're going to be celebrating quietly tonight. After the year we've had, I suppose maybe it's fitting. Though, I'm looking forward to a new year. I'm scared to death, but I'm looking forward to it. Don't get me wrong, 2011 had some wonderful things. I started grad school, Raul passed a big certification exam that can allow him to get jobs in the US (but we've yet to see that come to fruition), 3 great friends got married, several friends had children (many of them their first child), several more realized they were expecting their first. We saw a lot of trials in our personal life, financial struggles, health issues, lots of things we'd rather forget.

But we can't forget God's goodness while we wait with anticipation to see what 2012 will hold.

a look back and a glance ahead

2011-12-27T17:49:00.005-05:00

I'm not sure how many blog posts I've stopped and started this month. It's probably a high number. One reason I haven't written much is because some of the things going on are a can of worms I haven't felt like opening on a blog. Others are too personal. Other things...well, we're still seeing God move, so I wasn't sure when I should share the latest goings-on in our lives.

Still can't believe 2011 will be over this weekend. It's been a crazy year for us. So many ups and downs, path changes, and we're ending the year with more uncertainty. I remember saying at the beginning of the year that I wanted to see God move...and I sure did. But it, as it usually happens, He didn't quite move the way I expected. Nothing is ever easy with us :) But we know He didn't call us to an easy life. We also know He's never left our side through all of this.

We praise Him for continued great news about our friend who has healed remarkably well after surgery to remove a brain tumor. In the process, they've been able to enjoy some time in the States and celebrated both Thanksgiving and Christmas with her family...the first time in 10 years for her and the first ever for her husband and little girl. I'm sad to see them go back (being able to chat on the phone was a nice change for our communication), but I'm glad that my friend is doing so much better. We continue to pray for her healing as she goes back to China this weekend.

We praise Him for a blessed Christmas with my family and some close friends. Raul and I sang with our church's choir on Christmas morning, and the whole service was really special. We also sang on Christmas Eve with my dad at my parents' church.

We praise Him for my 4.0 GPA after my first semester of grad school. At the beginning of this year, I never knew how that would all work out, and here I am...1/5 of the way through school.

We praise Him for Raul's completion of his CNA course and pray and trust that he will be able to find a job soon after applying at 5 different places. He applied right before the holidays, so we know he may not hear back for another week or so.

We pray for our future plans. We're taking a huge leap of faith and looking into moving to Florida. Yes, Florida. Raul is looking at a PTA program at a school in St. Pete/Pinellas Park area, and we'll start there. Not sure how it will work out...we'd need a miracle with housing, a newer car that could make the trip to Florida, and jobs for both of us. Lots to work on.

And on top of this, Raul's visa renewal is still in-process. This is pretty frustrating for us, and hopefully some more bank statements/evidence and reference letters will take care of it when we send them in, hopefully next week. Please pray with us. People often ask why we have to go through this at all, and though I understand why...it doesn't make it any less frustrating when you hear things are delayed. And when I hear people gripe about immigration laws while we are going about things the right way, spending all this money to make sure my husband can stay in the country...you can imagine the amount of screaming I want to do sometimes. Yet, I try to stay optimistic and believe that God has a plan for us. It's hard though.

So that's where we are at the end of 2011. A year of many blessings, a year of many unanswered prayers, and looking ahead to what next year may hold.

I pray all of you have a very blessed new year.

2011-12-24T22:21:00.000-05:00

not such a good job, I guess

2011-12-06T19:48:00.003-05:00

Last year I participated in the Experiment in Thankfulness and now, looking back, I realized I should have done it this year as well. I don't feel I did such a good job this year. Participating would have knowingly kept me from complaining so much. I was quick to thank God for the obvious great things that happened (Raul passing his CNA exam and a dear friend recovering so well from a serious surgery), but the little things slid by, and it's those little things that can lead to ungratefulness and even envy and bitterness. Guilty. So as we headed into December, the first and second Sundays of advent focusing on hope and peace, respectively...I hope in what I do not see ahead of me and ask for His peace to as we try to do better at listening to Him.

I look back at where God has provided in the past and place my hope in Him...holding (or least trying to) unswervingly to the hope I profess, as Hebrews 10:23 says, because He is faithful to do what He promises. This doesn't stop my questions, wondering why I still feel like we're a waiting room after 2 years of being in the states. Why we've had so many ups and downs. Why things don't work out the way you originally plan. Why why why.

A couple of times this week, I've just had to stop myself and have a little cry...just to let it out. And when I reflect on this past Sunday's message about peace, I wonder how much peace I really feel...even though I say that I have a lot. I need to do a better job of listening to Him, of being still before Him and honestly, earnestly seeking Him, and doing it together with my husband. Maybe things would be different? I'm not sure, but at least I would know that I was waiting a little bit better.

November already?

2011-11-03T20:15:00.004-04:00

I'm not sure how it can be November already. But here we are. One of my favorite holidays is only 2 weeks away, and my other favorite is a month and 2 weeks away. Can't believe it's already holiday time.

First of all, thank you to many of you who prayed for our friend. She went through a very successful surgery on October 31, and the doctors were able to remove a tumor the size of an orange. She was discharged 4 (yes, 4) days later, and since her surgery, has been witnessing to everyone she can about His greatness. We serve a pretty awesome God :) I'm so thankful to Him for taking care of my friend.

Raul is doing well in clinicals for his CNA course, and we praise God for that. He'll finish up clinicals this week then take his state exam next week, then hopefully look for a job. Please pray for him as he prepares for and takes the exam. I have no worries that he'll do well, but I know he would appreciate prayers.

Did I mention that I started working with ESL classes at the church? I forget. Anyway... I love it. I have 2 students, my first official ESL students in the states, and they're great. And they don't mind being my guinea pigs, of sorts, as I test out some new theories and methods I'm learning in my classes (deciphering between what is too much information to share with them and what is just enough to be beneficial for them). It's really been a fun experience so far, and a great opportunity. It's nice to be back in ESL while I'm studying...keep my mind going going going all the time. But there is a lot to do before the semester is over.

In the midst of all our school busyness, I'm praying to see God work in one particular area of my life. Maybe I'll share it on here sometime as a separate post, but please pray with me that I will see God's hand in this area of my life. It's something I so want to resolve before the end of this year.

So there we have it.

why I love fall

2011-10-21T22:08:00.003-04:00

Fall is my favorite season. The following is a list of the reasons why :)

-pumpkin spice lattes at Starbucks

-pumpkin fro yo at JuJuBerry

-pumpkin bread, doughnuts...basically pumpkin pastries (are we noticing a theme here?)

-hot apple cider (and cider doughnuts, just in case you thought I was done with the pastry theme)

-chili (why are all these food so far?)

-football games (there...we've gotten away from food)

-gorgeous leaves

-trips to Brown County (going on one tomorrow)

-colder weather...which means hoodie sweatshirts, my all-time favorite thing to wear

I'm reminding myself of His wonderful creation, displayed to me through the changing of seasons as I have just been through a week full of distractions. I have my first big assignment due on Monday, and it's been pretty far from my mind as I've had a friend's current health situation weigh heavy on my heart. It's hard to stay focused when you're concerned about a friend who is physically far away from you and all you really want to do is hop on a plane to be with her. But at the same time, I look out the window as I'm writing this and can almost see the change in the air. The God I serve can heal my dear friend and sister, and He is the same God who creates beautiful things.

That's a huge jumble of thoughts, but that's what I'm reflecting on tonight.

what's up lately

2011-10-04T20:57:00.002-04:00

We continue to see evidence of what a great God we serve. Raul has been able to start his CNA course at Ivy Tech, and that will continue until just before Thanksgiving. After it finishes and he (hopefully) receives his certification, he'll look for a job as a CNA and we'll start saving up and preparing for the transfer up to Ft. Wayne. All in His timing.

Meanwhile, I'm loving being back in school. It's hard at times, I feel lost in all of the terminology on some days...but you know, it's completely worth it. I really love it. I'm learning so much, and that's a great feeling. As much as I loved my undergrad studies (once I finally discovered the major I was supposed to be in), grad school is so much better, to be completely, 100% focused on what it is that you want to do and feel like you're really moving towards a goal. And to feel equipped to achieve that goal...I picked the right school :) I miss the social interaction of being in a physical classroom, having the chance to meet new people, but it's okay. Online courses definitely have their benefits, too.

A side note to that: I'm back in the world of ESL after a 2 year break. I started volunteering on Wednesday nights at the ESL ministry our church hosts. I had to give up being in the choir (which was rough..if you know me, you know that was a rough choice), but it'll be worth it. I've never taught ESL in the States either, so it's a new environment for me. Very exciting opportunities happening. :)

Keep on keeping us in your prayers. Lots more things to do accomplish in the next couple of months. God's not done with us yet.

2011-09-20T19:46:00.002-04:00

This past Sunday, our pastor continued his series called "What If...?", taken from Acts and challenging the church to think outside the box and desire to see God do even more. What an awesome challenge. And in his sermon most recently, he shared a story about the church that was moved by the hand of God... (this particular passage copied from http://www.uchinsdale.org/blog/2008/07/work-tour-sighting-in-swan-quarter-nc/ )

In the 1870’s, the residents of Swan Quarter, NC wanted very much to build a church in the center of town. A very desirable vacant lot was chosen for the site; however, the owner of the lot really wasn’t interested in selling to a church. Years of negotiating ensued, and the church finally gave up its frustrating and unsuccessful pursuit of the lot and decided to build their building about a mile out of town on a small rise of land near Pamlico Sound. On September 16, 1876, the very day the new church was to be dedicated, a hurricane hit coastal Carolina. Heavy winds and rain, along with a strong tidal surge flooded the village with over five feet of water. Wind and water was so high it actually lifted the new church off of its new foundation. The church (the white clapboard structure shown above) was pushed north and then east, back into the village, eventually reaching the exact piece of property the congregation had previously tired to purchase. It turned itself and came to rest on the high ground, positioned perfectly on the Main Street lot. The owner of the property was so struck by the series of events; he decided that this was a sign from God – and that the church was to be in this location. He sold the property to the church. The brick structure (shown in the last picture) was later added. The original wooden church (middle picture) sits directly behind the newer church, in its original location.

Providence United Methodist Church still holds regular worship services, but is most commonly known now as “The Church Moved by the Hand of God”.

Now how's that for a story? One thing I took from that (there were many things, and they carried with me during the discussion in Sunday school immediately following) was this: you either work with God in what He's trying to do, or you get out of the way. The owner of that property saw the hand of God and saw what happened when He tried to stand in the way of God's plans. It didn't go so well for him. And we need to do the same. We as Christians and in the church need to get involved and get excited about what God's doing in the world. He wants us to get involved, we just have to want it for ourselves.

There was so much to learn and be challenged by in this sermon, and if you want to hear the whole thing and the rest of the series, go here http://www.collegewes.com/resources.

9/11 according to Catie...before and after

2011-09-10T21:16:00.005-04:00

Ten years ago today, I was a college junior. It was summit week at Indiana Wesleyan (special services with a special speaker and worship all week long) and I had been asked to sing on the worship team for the services. Monday had gone well, and I was preparing for the extra services on Tuesday.

That morning, I got ready to head over the the PPAC for sound check and rehearsal and decided to grab something to drink along the way. In the dorm lobby, I was standing at the vending machine when my friend Joy happened to walk by and mentioned that a plane had hit the world trade center. To be honest, my reaction was something along the lines of "oh, that's strange." My limited knowledge of the towers included the fact that they were really tall buildings...they'd probably be okay. So I continued on my way to the PPAC. I get there and the other members of the worship team were backstage, along with some of the PPAC technicicans. And everyone was talking about it. "We really made some people angry." "It was only a matter of time before something happened, with all the people we've angered"...something like that. I stayed completely silent, because in the little bubble I lived in, I didn't know anything about people who wanted to kill us or do harm to us. I don't think I even knew what a terrorist was. This was the level of my naivety. But I remember the people around me making decisions that the service was going to be canceled. So I went out into the auditorium and sat down to watch what the PPAC crew had put up on the big screen...Fox News (I think) showing video of the towers being hit. IWU students began walking in for what they thought was a Tuesday morning summit week service, and instead watching history unfold. It was unreal...so unreal that most of it is a blur in my memory. But I do remember it being completely silent in the PPAC. Then a reporter from the Marion paper came in and started talking to students. He talked to me and I remember giving a quote...can't remember what I said.

The only other thing I remember about that day was the memorial service that night...all solemn worship. Then I remember, I guess it was, some time later when the memorial services were happening on tv and being televised. Practically the whole student body gathered in the student center to watch them on the little televisions. And that was my bubble. Life went on.

Ten years later, 9/11 has changed me. I'm more aware of the world around me. I've traveled to several countries and lived in 2 of them, one of them a communist country that is not free like my own. I've come to appreciate my home, a place that I once took for granted and now don't (at least I try not to). I'm more knowledgeable about the world around me as well. I've developed a strong desire to learn about other cultures, religions, and ways of life.

I've learned that there is real evil in this world, people who would do unspeakable acts in the name of religion or personal beliefs.

But I've also learned that God is there through it all. He's seen our country through unspeakable acts and been there every step of the way...if we chose to see Him. He was there with the people on flight 93 when they made the brave decision to storm that cockpit. He was there with a woman who was saved from the rubble of the twin towers 27 hours after they'd fallen. He was there with people like Lisa Beamer who lost her husband. And He's still there.

We all have our 9/11 stories of where we were that morning, how we've changed since then, what we've learned. I just wanted to share mine.

2011-09-02T20:32:00.002-04:00

Typically Labor Day signals the end of summer and the beginning of fall? That's hard to believe when it almost hit 100 degrees today :p But they say that by the actual holiday on Monday, it'll be in the 70's. I'll believe it when I feel it and can wear a hoodie sweatshirt and flip flops (the Indiana uniform for fall) out in it.

I really praise God for the past 2 weeks. Two weeks ago, I was so down, so discouraged, so emotional that I really just wanted to crawl into a hole and stay there. But in the past 2 weeks, God has brought me out of that. I'm not saying the hard times are over, because unfortunately they may not be for awhile, but I'm resting in His grace and in His peace that has really washed over me. It's odd. We're still in the middle of all this shtuff, but I can actually smile again. I don't feel so stressed. I don't feel so anxious. And I definitely don't feel so emotional (haven't cried in about 2 weeks, if that tells you anything). God is so good. For one of my classes, we had to make a biographical star with 5 words for the points. Then we were supposed to comment on each others and guess what the words signified. One of my 5 words on my 5 points of my star was the word "grace". Only one person in my class got the significance of the word (some others thought it was the name of my cat?). But I wanted to use that task to show the Father that that word, that little 5-letter word, has meant so much to me lately.

My classes for grad school officially/unofficially started last week, and I say that because Hurricane Irene hit New York City (where my uni is, if you don't know) and things got a little jumbled. But we are now off and running, and I love it so much. I'm still trying to get used to being back in an academic setting (albeit online), but so are my classmates. It's going to be a really great experience, and I'm excited to see what the next 2 years have in store.

what happened to the book?

2011-08-18T19:48:00.004-04:00

My book is still writing itself. By this, I mean that after almost 2 years of being in the states and having this strong desire to tell our story, I can see day by day how there's still more to be written before the actual writing. I want this book to be written someday, but I'm glad God has reminded me that He's not finished writing His part yet. Someday, it will be my turn to put the story on paper.

The past week and a half have felt like a month. So much has happened, so much has changed, and so many emotions have been present...relief, frustration, discouragment, exhaustion, confusion...almost all negative. But the guiding force has been our faith in God. That faith in God evolved into the realization that we must also be practical and realize when we are at the end of our means and God is trying to tell us something. We came to this point on, I believe, Monday. Again, there have been a lot of long days, so everything's a bit fuzzy. But now, we move in a new direction with Raul's education, and once again, we trust in God's perfect plan and perfect timing. Right now, we just want Raul to be able to finish school with a good degree, get into a good job, and we can start our lives yet again.

All of this has come at the same time we are helping a friend as she prepares for her first year in China. We first met her when we were attending FWC and were in the same Sunday school class. At the time, she was ending her studies at Indiana Wesleyan and graduating with a degree in math education. When she started asking us about teaching in China, I went into excitement mode and began telling her all about Nanjing, NEIS, and NICF (and yes, all the abbreviations we use probably confused her :) Well, she was interested! And things have gone so well, she is boarding a plane bound for Nanjing next week. God has orchestrated all of this so well. I had always hoped I would be able to connect someone from IWU with Nanjing, to build that bridge and have someone from my hometown see the wonder that is living in Nanjing... and I'm so glad that she has an open heart and mind to be willing to go. It's been fun sharing insights, "wisdom", and tips with her, as well as preparing her for the reality of life in a culture very different from our own. But God has been in the time we've spent with her, and I couldn't be more excited for her. Sometimes I wish I could stow-away in her suitcase and go along :) but I'm really excited. I've even been reading my old China journals and blog posts (goodness I was ridiculous sometimes!) lately, trying to think of things to share with her...and God has reminded me over and over again where He has brought me from. It's just amazing, and it makes me glad I have a written record of all the blessings so I can never forget .

So how to get through the tough times? Immerse yourself in the joy of others, focus on your blessings, and just praise God. Yes, our story's not done yet.

what if your blessings come through raindrops?

2011-08-11T18:05:00.006-04:00

I haven't posted in awhile because...well, when you've had a couple of weeks like we have, the last thing you really want to do is blog.

Life has been tough, I'm not going to lie. We've had to rely on strength that only comes from God. All of this craziness from this summer has come to it's mountaintop in the past week when we've realized we really don't have much, except our faith in God and the support of our wonderful parents and a few friends we rely on to keep us sane. After a summer of questions, I feel like we have even more questions...and uncertainty. There's so much to be done in the next couple of weeks...and it all has to happen in the next couple of weeks. Anxious and stressed doesn't even begin to describe the feelings I go through just about every day.

We are okay. Our marriage has never been stronger, and I praise Him for that. This present trouble is so stressful, but the way we have been able to rely on each other encourages me so much. Not sure where I'd be without Raul right now...scares me to think. And though times are hard and stressful, I know He will bring us through on the other side.

Please keep us in your prayers. I know this situation, this time is only temporary. And if I'm being honest, sometimes that's what keeps me pushing through. But I've been so encouraged by music lately. The other day, a really tough one that kinda started my "downward spiral", I was in the car waiting on Raul while he was in a meeting, and a song came on K-Love that just caused my tears to flow even more. And I can't remember what song it was....that drives me nuts. But instead of that song, this song is what kept coming to mind after that...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IWGf4a4ngM8

Then there's this song... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eOOFAaUGfRE&feature=related

So after writing all of that, and thinking more about what we're going through...we have so much to be thankful for. Times are tough, yes, but God is so, so good. We've been in the states for almost 2 years now, and He has not let us down in our time of need. And I know He won't know. We serve such a faithful God.

"What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise?"

the time we were in a wedding

2011-07-24T16:40:00.003-04:00

So I've sung in weddings, I've done the guestbook, I've been a friend or relative in attendance, and I've been the bride. But I'd never been a bridesmaid...until last Friday.

My girl Jamie is no longer the single gal I knew and loved in China (and have continued to love since Raul and I moved away from China), but she is now married. In the years that I've known her, and it definitely feels like more than 4, she would talk about her desire to get married and see that plan revealed in her life...she waited patiently for it. And God heard her by bringing an incredible man like Levi into her life. As one of several ladies I know (it's weird that we're becoming a "trend") to marry into an international family, there's nothing like knowing that God can take you both from your homelands and bring you together in a way that only He can orchestrate and execute. I know that His divine purpose is present in every relationship, but to be able to say that I moved thousands of miles and continents away from home to meet my love...it's pretty amazing what God can do. And God has given Jamie and Levi that blessing as well.

This past weekend, Raul and I with my parents went to Mt. Sterling, IL to be a part of their wedding. I was one of 8! bridesmaids and Raul was one of 3 groomsmen. My dad and I also did a duet during the ceremony. And I threw (along with some help) a shower for Jamie the night before the wedding. Being a part of their special day was such a joy for us and something we had looked forward to for several months. It really was the highlight of our summer and something we won't forget.

On top of it being Jamie and Levi's wedding, it was a reunion of sorts. For Jamie, it was a chance to get her whole family together while she was in the States, to gather friends from her college days, and for those of us former Nanjingren to see each other in an unfamiliar setting...the US. Those of us in that last group, the Kaparazes, the Mengs, and the Mwenyas (as well as a couple of others that I had heard about but never met) had an amazing time together and made the most of the time we had together. It was such a special time that we all hated leaving. But we also knew God would give us that time again...someday.

So thank you to Jamie and Levi for letting all of us be a part of your special day, for allowing us to share in that reunion, and for making some pretty special memories we won't soon forget. We love you!

Tehillah, Jamie and Levi Arana, Raul and me, and Kimberly

Kennedy and Maryann, and us

me and the bride :)

things that bless my heart

2011-07-18T18:03:00.002-04:00

Despite all the anxieties about finances, school in the fall, work in the fall, and Raul's visa renewal, I want to focus on the blessings. And there are plenty.

-our car. Our need for a car was something we prayed about for several months, and God delivered. A friend of Raul's sold us their car for a very good price (because that's all we could afford), and we went to pick it up last Thursday. God is truly good and He answers prayer.

- the chance to study again. Though my head is spinning with all I need to keep with in order to start an online program, I'm really excited about the possibilities. I know I will need His grace in order to juggle everything that will come my way in just a month and a half's time, but with His strength, I think I'm up for the challenge.

-our church. I'm blessed by sermons that just challenge me (said with a fist in the air) every single Sunday. Even when I miss a Sunday, I can download the sermon onto the ipod and be equally blessed. I've never heard sermons on Jonah like the series CWC is going through now. I would highly recommend downloading the podcast or watching online (www.collegewes.com) when you get the chance.

- people who encourage us and support us. Our families are great, especially now when we seems to be going through so many hills and valleys. To ask your family to have faith in His plan while you're struggling with your own faith...it's tough, but God is good.

- a wedding. Thursday morning, we and my parents will drive to Mt. Sterling, Illinois, for a little wedding (haha) celebration for Jamie and Levi. I've never been more excited about a wedding (other than my own, of course), and I can hardly wait. I'm probably driving Jamie nuts with all the emails I send her with little questions and comments, but it's just because I'm so excited :) Raul and I are in the wedding party, my dad and I are singing, and I'm throwing her a shower (with a lot of help from her mom) the night before the wedding. Gonna be a crazy but awesome 2 days :) I'm so excited for these 2, I could just burst! That and it's going to be an awesome Nanjing reunion with them, the Mengs, and the Mwenyas...it doesn't get much better :)

2011-06-29T09:57:00.003-04:00

Wow. It's an exciting time for us, but goodness....there is so much going on and so much to rely on God for. That's as it should be, because without Him, we'd never be where we are right now. But I'd also feel a lot better if He was providing the needs we have right now. He also knows we don't need it right now, thus we're in a waiting period. Grrrr.

If you've noticed on facebook, I was accepted to grad school. I'd like to think that my in-person admissions interview helped, because I heard back from The New School just 2 days ago...and I was told it may not be until mid-July. Not only was I accepted into the MA TESOL program, but I was offered a scholarship to cover some of my tuition costs. The letter says this scholarship was merit-based and will continue to be so as I go through my studies. This really hit me hard, and I was crying as I read it. In addition to the blessing, I was touched by it. The reason being, going into this interview, I felt inadequate. I mentioned this to Raul, my parents, and even to my cousin who I called asking for advice the night before the interview. "But Catie, you have five years of experience! How could you feel inadequate?" I just did. I don't know the technical vocabulary, a lot of the methodology, and I feel...out of practice I guess since I haven't taught ESL for 2 years now. But there I was, in this interview 2 weeks ago today, talking about my lesson plan that I had written and explaining why I felt it be portrayed my teaching style and curriculum of choice. I have no idea where a lot of the words came from, and some of it I didn't even realize I was saying...but she told me I was making sense, so I must have sounded somewhat intelligent. And I had to smile inside. Here was a woman who has year and years of experience, has published books, and has her own ESL resource website...and she was interested in me. But for the grace of God. Then to not only be accepted but to receive a scholarship based on merit....God is good.

I probably sound so childish saying all this, but to be honest, it was the pick-me-up I needed. It feels good knowing you are accepted, that you have knowledge and that you're not a lot of "show". And now, I'm so excited to start classes in the fall. I know it's going to be a lot of work, a lot of time management, and some sacrifices will have to be made, but I feel I'm ready.

I think. :)

Summer's Cool

2011-06-26T18:37:00.003-04:00

A great great book. And though it's for elementary-level readers, adults can enjoy it, too. The reading program we were involved with at our church last week, Summer's Cool, dove into this book. There were daily readings of the book, then the students were split up by grade-level to do activities and discussions associated with the book. Raul and I were particularly excited because the book was written by a Chinese American and is about China...it incorporates Chinese folktales and culture into a fantasy story that's very well-written. We worked with the 3rd grade students, and the teacher we aided is an ESL teacher who did her student teaching in China. Go figure :) So we had a great time getting to know her and teaching our students about China. At the end of the week, parents were invited to see what the children had been learning about and take part in kite-flying, eating with chopsticks (that was fun to teach!), origami, and writing Chinese characters. It was such a fun day...and I missed China a little bit :) The week was a great experience for us and something we really loved being involved in. Getting kids excited about reading and learning, and helping them expand their worldview and learn about another country...that's pretty great :)

the New York City trip

2011-06-22T20:33:00.004-04:00

The photos are all on facebook, providing the visual record of our trip, but I thought I'd provide a written record, too. It was a trip we don't want to forget, so if for no other reason, I'm writing this so Raul and I don't forget the details.

Monday, June 13: We flew out of Indianapolis at almost 6pm on Southwest Airlines. This was the first time we'd taken Southwest, and I was pretty impressed....mostly with being able to pick my own seat :) We flew to Chicago Midway (bigger fan of Midway than O'Hare), had a 2 hour layover, then got on a plane to Newark, NJ. Once there, we waited for a taxi that Helen, the woman we were staying with, had ordered for us. A little while later, we arrived at her family's gorgeous house in Kearny, NJ. It was late by that point, we were tired...so we went to bed.

Tuesday, June 14: We went into the city via the New Jersey/New York Path train with Helen's husband. It was nice having convenient public transportation so close by, and we were able to figure it out quickly (much easier than the NYC subway system, if you ask me) . We got off the Path train at the site of the World Trade Center, got swept up in the crowd of businessmen and women headed to work on Wall Street and the World Financial Center, so we got a little lost trying to get to Battery Park. Took the long way to Battery Park, or as I call it the scenic route along the waterfront, the southern tip of Manhattan. It was a gorgeous morning, especially as the statue and Liberty Island came into view. At 11:30, after typical NYC street fare of pretzels (yumm!) for lunch, we got in line for our Statue of Liberty/Ellis Island tickets. After heavy security, we were on a ferry headed to Libery Island. We spent well over an hour on the island, marveling at just how amazing the statue is, taking lots of photos, helping others take photos, and just...taking it all in. Then we boarded another ferry to Ellis Island and the museum. I didn't enjoy this as much as I'd hoped I would (mostly my swollen ankle ruined it for me), but it was a special experience for us because of the history and the reminder of where we all (with the exception of Native Americans) come from. In all, a very patriotic sort of day :) After an early dinner at a TGI Friday's on Broadway, we got back on the Path train to New Jersey and enjoyed an evening of resting and spending time with Helen and her daughter.

Wednesday, June 15: Grad school admissions interview! We took the Path train into the city again and this time to a station near 14th street and 5th Avenue. A short walk to The New School University English Language Studies department on 5th Avenue, and there I was for my interview. Let's just say, I really want to get into the program :) I won't find out until probably mid-July if I've been accepted, but the interview got me really excited for the program (though it'll be crazy hectic to get used to). So we'll see! After the interview, we had lunch then took the subway to Times Square. I won't forget the feeling when we got to street level out of the subway. I'd been there before, but there's still no preparing you for all that comes at you...all the advertisements, billboards, tv screens, noise, people...it's craziness. But we took our time walking around, taking photos, watching people, really taking it all in. To get back to New Jersey, we made our way through the confusion at the Port Authority bus terminal (so confusing!) and enjoyed an evening relaxing and resting up.

Thursday, June 16: Umm...what did we do? Oh yeah. :) We caught a very early bus (the Port Authority bus that dropped us off on Wednesday has a bus that goes back, and we took it at 6am) into the city and power walked to Rockefeller Plaza, arriving just 20 minutes after the Today Show had started. We were able to get a pretty good spot to stand, but unfortunately not where they were taping any of the segments. But we did get to meet Ann Curry and Matt Lauer, saw Savannah Guthrie (sp?) and Jim Carrey from a distance. It was such a fun experience. It was a gorgeous day, so we knew it was a good day to go to the Top of the Rock, the observation deck at the top of 30 Rock. We'd heard it had a better view than the Empire State building, and I think it did...namely because we could take pictures of the Empire State building from way up high. And there were 3 top floors you could wander around. We also shopped at the NBC Experience store and had lunch in the basement level of 30 Rock. To finish out the afternoon, we got on the first leg of our 48 hour pass for the Gray Line bus tours. We took it from Times Square to the World Trade Center and got off to head back to New Jersey.

Friday June 17: Back on the Path train to the city then back on the bus tours, this time getting off the downtown tour for a tour through Brooklyn. This was a great tour (highly recommend the All Loops Tour on the Gray Line tours...very worth the price), made even better because of the personality of our guide, a Brooklyn-ite(is that the right word?). Helped me see Brooklyn in a different light...it's a lot more scenic than I had expected. Back in Manhattan, we got an another tour that finished the loop through downtown and midtown. By the time we got back to Times Square, it had started to rain, and by the time we got to store to wait out the rain, it was like a hurricane was going through Manhattan...rain and wind and even people going sideways between the skyscrapers. :p Craaazy weather. We shopped in a souvenir shop, then when it had calmed down, we moved to the M&M store, then to the Hershey's store. By that time, it had started to die down, so we got back on the Gray Line buses and took another half loop downtown to the World Trade Center, then back to New Jersey. By then the heavens had opened up with tons of rain...and we were in for the night :)

Saturday, June 18th: For our last day in Manhattan, we took the Port Authority bus into the city and walked through the theater district, into Times Square for the beginning of the street market (only in the summer and on Saturdays, I guess) where I bought a new bag. Then we continued on a walk towards Rockefeller Plaza, went through some stores there and had lunch again in the basement of 30 Rock (when you find a good place to go, go more than once). After lunch, we had some time before our matinee, so we walked up and down 5th Avenue, stopping in a few shops and the Trump Tower, and taking lots of photos. Then it was time for our matinee of Mary Poppins. It was my 3rd Broadway show, Raul's first...and he loved every minute of it :) We had been so torn on what to see, not able to make up our minds, and though Mary Poppins wasn't our first choice, I'm very glad we went to see it. The changes from the movie were great, as was the music, the costumes, the magic, all of it :) Just made you smile at the end. We headed back to New Jersey then and met Helen's family for some Filipino food....something that never ceases to amaze me about life in New York. Every nationality is represented well, even the smallest of countries, and you can travel the world in just one city. Love it :)

Sunday, June 19: We headed home. Said goodbye to Helen and her family, our gracious hosts, and got on a plane taking us first to Baltimore, and then to Indianpolis where we celebrated Fathers' Day with my family.

Words can't really describe our trip, though I can do it journal-style and bore you to death. But it really was an amazing trip and opened our eyes so much. We can't wait to go back.

2011-06-12T16:32:00.002-04:00

School *finally* ended last Tuesday (thank you snow days), and not a moment too soon. I was ready to get my summer on. Spent the first few days out packing and preparing for New York and taking care of what seemed to be lots of little details. In the midst of all this, I had a couple of "girl time" appointments, one for lunch and another for dinner the following day. Both equally great and refreshing :)

On a nervous whim, I emailed the school I applied to for graduate studies and asked if I could visit the school and their offices. That little request turned into an admissions interview! Go figure. so if you wouldn't mind praying for me at 10am on Wednesday, I'd appreciate it. I feel intimidated by the whole process because I still doubt my skills and knowledge in TESOL, but I guess that's what grad school is for, right?

Lots of people have asked what we're going to be doing in New York while we're there, and I rattle off a list. But honestly, we still don't know how the week is going to work out, and this is driving me a little crazy. I'm a planner, especially when it comes to trips to places I've never really been to(though I spent 3 short days there in 2003, I'm still a rookie when it comes to NYC), so not having every day planned out and basically going along with the weather has me a little frazzled. I'm weird. But it's overwhelming, too, because the list of places we want to go is growing by the day...especially when people share their NYC stories and give you their suggestions of where you should go. *sigh* We definitely won't be bored over the next 6 days, that's for sure! What we do have set in our plans is Tuesday (Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island) and Wednesday morning (graduate school interview). The rest is up to the weather and what part of the city we feel like tackling that day :)

Pray for traveling safety. I've flown countless times, but I think domestic travel has me more anxious than international travel ever did. Don't know why.
Pray for my interview on Wednesday, for His will to be done as I approach this door of furthering my studies.
Pray for our days there, for a good sense of direction :) and for good weather that we can really enjoy this trip.
Pray that we can strengthen our marriage and relationship while traveling together. We haven't been alone together this long on a trip since Raul's visa interview in Guangzhou in June of '09, and we really need this time together.

We'll try to be in touch over the next week :) Be blessed.

2011-05-31T20:08:00.004-04:00

I'm sorry I haven't written on here lately. A lot has been going on, and maybe I'll have some time to write after the school year ends next week. But in the meantime, I'll let you know that I'm job hunting as my job for the fall may not work out, and I'm praying for a lot of guidance and direction. I trust in a God who is faithful and has never let me down. He knows what we need, when we need it, and we know that somehow, some way, He will provide. I heard a sermon on Sunday about not worrying and instead simplifying my life by simply trusting in Him...but goodness, it's hard when things seem to pile up.

Happy Mothers Day!

2011-05-08T21:22:00.001-04:00

Here's a response I wrote on Karen Kingsbury facebook, in response to a contest to tell why our mom is so special. We're supposed to get the most "likes" on our comment so we can win the contest. So far, I have 6. :) Probably not going to win, but every word I wrote is true.
my mother is special because almost 7 years ago she put her daughter (me) in God's hands and saw me get on a plane and move to the other side of world (China). During the 5 years I lived there, she visited me 3 times (a 13 flight back and f...orth 3 times...she deserves a medal) and even flew over with my dad for my wedding in 2008. She has always been a dedicated mother who never hesitated, even when it was hard, to support my choices in life. She felt scared many times about the situation I was living in, but she knew God would take care of me and she never lost faith. I have a very special mom.

SCC in Nanjing, I Will Be Here

2011-05-08T21:18:00.000-04:00

In addition to be it being Mothers Day, today was the day 3 years ago that Steven Curtis Chapman did an amazing concert in Nanjing. He dedicated "I Will Be Here" to me and Raul...and it was a moment I will never forget. After the concert we were able to meet him and take a photo together. A priceless memory. Yesterday, SCC received an honorary doctorate from his alma mater, Anderson University, which is just a half hour down the road from where we live. His wife had posted a live webcast of the graduation on her facebook, so yesterday my mom and I watched him receive his honoary doctorate of music and give the commencement address. His speech touched my heart as I also remember that almost 3 years ago, his family's life changed forever. I've learned so much from their testimony over the years and as I read Mary Beth's book, but yesterday I was reminded again of how God proves Himself faithful on this journey called life...something I needed to hear.
A jumble of thoughts, but I wanted to share this video again as well as the special place I have in my heart for the Chapman family.

3 years!

2011-05-02T17:53:00.002-04:00

It's May 3rd already in China, and since that's where we got married, I guess it's technically already my anniversarry :) And it's been 3 years since I married my best friend. Hard to believe it's been that long, but even longer that we've been together...5 years now. Crazy to think about what God has done in our lives in that time. But I'm so thankful He brought Raul into my life and that He's given us so much in these past few years. We are truly blessed.

Hallelujah!!! Jesus is Alive!!!

2011-04-23T22:31:00.000-04:00

last day of Lent

2011-04-23T09:29:00.002-04:00

When I started my facebook fasting journey 39 days ago, I thought I'd get all philosophical in my writings on my blog and talk about the spiritual applications of giving something up for Lent and what it's taught me. The Lenten season didn't quite go that way for me. Instead, I spent a lot of it either sick or with some other health problems, not to mention extremely busy with changes at work, church things that have been going on, and applying to grad school. It's been a busy Lenten season, that's for sure. And I'm sad to say that I didn't get to do the reflection I had hoped about what it means to give up a form of communication that, for some of us, is like breathing.

I didn't miss facebook as much as I thought I would. Sure, I missed looking at photos of my friends' new babies (yes, friends...I had 3 give birth while I was on my fast), but that just made me all the more purposeful in keeping in touch through another form of communication (texting, sad to say). Though the one friend who lives in CA, I don't have a phone number for...so there's a lot of catching up to do. I missed keeping up with a few friends in China who get to use facebook (if you know the firewall they live behind, you'll understand why I say "get to"), but again...I had to be purposeful in emails.

What I didn't miss....some of the junk that's on facebook. I'll just leave it at that so I'm not criticized or called a hypocrite. Sure I've been responsible for some of that junk, and I'm not proud of it. Being away from facebook for 40 days has helped me to rethink some of the things I post online. And though we live in a free country and are free to express our opinions (at least for now), some things are better kept to yourself. I'm going to try to be better about that.

I wish you all a very blessed Resurrection Sunday. I am very excited about how we are spending ours at our new church, singing in the choir and lifting up praises to our Risen Lord. I want to remember what this day is really all about.

And it's not the day where I'm "allowed" to get back on facebook.

how I spent my 30th

2011-04-16T08:46:00.002-04:00

I was really happy when I found out that my birthday fell on a half-day at school (teacher in-service day, and as an aide, I'm typically not required to go). And when I found out that the annual Vera Bradley 4-day outlet sale fell during my birthday, I knew exactly what I wanted to do :) I was introduced to Vera products last year when I first started working at Park, and it started to grow on me...at first I wasn't so sure I like it. But now I think I'm hooked, and I knew going to the outlet sale I'd heard so much about would be fun. It was :) Raul and I with my parents went up to Ft. Wayne right after I got out of school. Dad and Raul went to a park while Mom and I got in line for our ticketed 3pm session at the sale. I've never seen anything like it in my life! The obscene amounts of stuff people will buy...it's just crazy. So I filled up my shopping bag, went about my business...and spent some time gawking at all the things other people were picking up :) But in all, I got some good buys and had fun experiencing it with my mom.

standing in line, wearing my "It's my 30th" pin my cousin Jennifer said I was required to wear. I took it off right after Mom took this pic.

ticket to the 3pm session...the ticketed session are the best way to do it, if you have the time to do it just a tiny glimpse of the madness that is the Vera Bradley outlet sale

after, we had dinner at TGI Fridays then some Coldstone ice cream :) I got the Birthday Cake Remix. it was good, but I still like the apple pie ala Coldstone the best

It was a very happy birthday :)

Happy Birthday Grandpa

2011-04-14T07:13:00.003-04:00

Dear Grandpa,
I guess you probably know how much I miss you. I've been thinking about you even more recently as Raul has been struggling as he's so far away from his grandma who is in bad health. You and I know what that's like, don't we? But I've been giving him (I hope) words of comfort that were shared with me while I was so far away from you. And I can see how much he misses his Lola, just as I missed you then and miss you now.

Today you would have been 84. I had mom remind me, but that's probably no surprise. Once we got past that point where we could add your age to get mine :) I started to lose track of how old you were...probably because you never looked that old. You were so strong here on earth, and I'm sure you're even more so in heaven in your new body. I miss many things about you, but what I miss most of all are these days, when we would celebrate our day together. When I was younger, it was with birthday parties and cake. When I was older, it was just a phone call, but I looked forward to those phone calls every year, especially when I moved to China. I miss hearing your voice.

I miss you so much. Happy Birthday Grandpa.

Love,
Catie

A side note, to those of you who have already at 7:30 this morning written birthday greetings on facebook, thank you so much :) I feel so blessed this morning.

think I'm happy to turn 30 now :)

2011-04-13T20:51:00.002-04:00

If I was able to post a status on facebook today, this is what it would read: After today, turning 30 has got to better than my ending to year 29. It was a dooooozy of a day. But the end was a blessing. I almost didn't go to choir practice because of the doozy of a day, but God showed me that I couldn't stay home and have a pity party...I needed to go and be among worshippers. And I'm glad I went. God blesses obedience...even when a pity party sounds like a great idea and completely warranted.

finishing out the 20's

2011-04-10T19:58:00.003-04:00

I've been pondering for awhile now what it means to turn 30 and why this is such a big deal. If you ever wondered why I'm such a dork and I think about things like this...I have no answer for you. But it's really made me think lately about what turning 30 represents. Obviously it's something because there are greeting cards specifically for that age...and not again til you turn 40 (ah!!). People have a bucket list for their 20's before they turn 30 (I'm still trying to understand what that "bucket list" means since it became a part of our vocab while I was overseas, so if I misused it, I apologize). I guess turning 30 is a big deal. And I suppose it is for me as well. My 20's were an eventful decade for me. I attended and graduated college. I spent 4 months in Spain and discovered my love for TESOL there. I made the life-changing decision to move to Asia and spent the better part of the decade living in China. I did things I never imagined I could, living on my own for 4 years in a very different country. I developed friendships, a ministry, and a life-calling during these years. And, I met the love of my life and got married. Needless to say, the years I spent in China were life-changing. then, I moved back to the states and finished out my 20's where I started them....in my parents' house in our small hometown in Indiana. I guess you can call that going full circle. And when I type it that way, it sounds a little bit like a downer. Maybe it is, but only if I view it that way. My 20's were great to me. I learned so much in the past decade, I became a different person, and I saw a glimpse of where I want to be in the next 10 years. But part of that is still...incomplete I guess. I'm not a mother yet, and I really wanted to be by the time I turned 30. Raul and I aren't living on our own. We still don't have "our own life". In some ways, I'm not where I wanted to be. But then (don't you just love all these "buts"?), I can never forget how blessed I am. The education I received at IWU, the life I had overseas, meeting the love of my life in another country...none of that should be discounted. The lesson? Be thankful for every day, every year you are given. I'm going to be optimistic as I approach this rather big birthday and enjoy every minute of it. I will reflect on the blessings of the past decade then wait and see what God has in store for the next decade.

let the 30-ness begin!

2011-04-02T22:14:00.004-04:00

I know that God is faithful and sees us at our point of need. We just had a great day in Columbus, O-H-I-O, a day trip with my parents, brother, and his girlfriend. It was an early celebration of my 30th birthday, and I felt so blessed.

We had a great lunch at a German restaurant in Columbus's German Village with a take-home cream puff that is to die for. :)

then, after some shopping at Easton (my knee barely hung in there, but if you know Easton, you know it's worth it :), we went back to my aunt and uncle's house for a suprise birthday celebration. My cousin Jennifer made sure I was all decked out with a sash, pin, hat, glasses, and party horn...she doesn't know I'll get her back when she turns 30 in November ;) My aunt and uncle's bichons weren't sure what to think of the horn :)

a present from my parents... My mom is a big fan of P.Buckley Moss's paintings, and while she and my dad were down in Florida, she ordered this print for me and had the studio send it to her after it was framed, personalized, and autographed. I l-o-v-e it :) For those of you who don't know...the snowmen are spelling out O-H-I-O :) my cute birthday cake. My family is all about the picture cakes, and this year was no exception. It was a pretty cute picture of me and a doll of mine....we just don't remember how old I was in it. But I was pretty cute :) It was such a great day, and at the end of it, as I'm typing after a week of pretty nasty pain and discomfort...the pain is starting to leave my leg. God heard my prayers and the prayers of many others who have seen how much I struggled this week. He's been faithful in that, and I know He will be just as faithful in every aspect of my life.

where to go from here

2011-04-01T20:26:00.002-04:00

Boy it's been a week...it feels sometimes like it was 2 weeks. At the end of my spring break, I developed a nasty calf cramp/sprain that's been lingering all week and has (maybe?) just started to go away. It made for a rough week at work. But it also caused me to slow down and remember that I am turning 30 (13 days! AH!) and need to take care of my body...and not just my leg. It's not a fun lesson to learn.

Continue to pray for us. We're really looking to God for direction in several areas, really seeking Him and wanting to know His plan for us. Raul's schooling and my application are in His hands. We're both feeling kind of lost right now and could really use some prayers. You leave a place that's familiar (as familiar as China can be after 5 years), a good job, a place to live, and a "family" to come back (well for me) home. You trust that you're following God's path, but when those roadblocks go up, you start to doubt that you made the right decision and become frustrated and confused. Please pray for us.

The season of Lent and learning continues...

more thoughts during Lent

2011-03-24T17:45:00.004-04:00

This was supposed to be a break from work, but it hasn't been much of that. Other than trying to get more sleep (more on that in a second) and tackling the new Karen Kingsbury book today (love it!), it hasn't been much of a break. I've been sick pretty much the whole week and developed a nasty cough 2 days ago that didn't allow me (or Raul...poor guy) much sleep on Tuesday night. Yesterday was even worse, and today my chest and my back have been killing me, probably from all the coughing and hacking yesterday. Lovely.

In addition to that, my journey to grad school got turned on its head when I realized I had missed by almost 2 months the deadline to apply to the school I was kind of set on. But, it's all good because now I'm pursuing a school I actually started looking a few years ago when we were still in Nanjing. I'm pretty excited about it. Not excited about the tuition cost or any more debt, but I really feel that going on in my education is where God wants me to be, to achieve His purposes for me in the field of ESL. I'm just going to trust Him for provision and direction. It's a rough road, especially as I stare at more and more debt and wishing we could be in a "stable" situation (whatever that means).

Then I'm reminded that I should not complain. Forgive me, Lord. With all that's going on in the world, I have no place to complain. What a reminder that's been for me this season of Lent.

This past Sunday, Raul and I went back to a church that was my home church for many years, got me through my teens and college years and has such a special place in my heart. And we may be going back more often...but that's a whole other story. In any case, the pastor, one I could never tire of hearing preach, gave a message on the transfiguration. The church recently finished their "mountain top" moment while going through a book written by 2 of the pastors, and, from I gather, it had a profound effect on many in the congregation. And though I didn't read the book, I was more than open to what the pastor shared about the disciples journey up to the mountain top, the Jesus they encountered at the top of the mountain, and what they went through when they came back down. What struck me was the little faith of the disciples, unable to cast out a demon...after they had just seen Jesus in all His amazing glory and knew what it meant. Instead, the father of the boy came to Jesus and asked if He could do what the disciples could not.
Here's what I got from all that, and these are the pastor's thoughts, not mine...
- this is a parable of our day. Many people want to see Jesus, and they get us instead. We are a people of controvery, unable to reach the potential He allows for us. Jesus said it's because we don't have faith.
- Little faith is when you see the power of evil more than the power of God.

That really hit home for me. With all that's going on in the world, I pray I will be able to see the power of God instead of the work of the evil one and how he is working to create chaos, division, and confusion. Let it be so, Lord.

10 days in, GRE check!

2011-03-19T20:27:00.003-04:00

So I survived the GRE. On to more important things...like March Madness :) I didn't used to be so much into college basketball until, really, I think last year when Butler made it to the final game. This year we're cheering on OSU (of course), Purdue, Notre Dame, and Butler (again). I even bought a Butler shirt today in Ft. Wayne at the Universitees store in the mall. Butler is one of those schools you can't help but love, especially after last year. :) As of right now, at this point in their game against Pittsburgh, it's touch and go...Go Butler!

I guess my break can officially begin since the test is over, but I know I have a lot of work to do this week on my application's "scholarly work", personal statement, and the actual application. My problem is that I haven't given myself a deadline and I really really really need to if I want to get in for the fall semester. All that time I would spend on facebook during my break needs to be put to good use, that's for sure. Lots to do, Catie. I'm turning 30 in less than a month now. Guess it's time to learn to how to prioritize :)

9 days in

2011-03-18T20:12:00.002-04:00

I have to praise God for several things today...
Spring break started at 3:05pm today :) It's a spring break much-needed!
We have our laptop back. After some back and forth and ordering a recovery disk, we have it back. It's been wiped out, but we have it back. A wiped out laptop is better than no laptop.
The weather the past few days has been beautiful.
The facebook fast has been going surprisingly really well and I've been strong. I haven't even come close to cheating (other than hearing my mom read some people's statuses aloud), and I don't really miss facebook at the moment. I say that now because it's been a crazy crazy week.

I remind myself of all things I should praise Him for as I look back on some of the most emotionally, physically, and spiritually draining 2 weeks I've experienced in a long time. God has definitely been at work, but a lot of it has been painful to go through. I would request your prayers...many things needs to remain unspoken, but I will voice aloud a need for prayers for my GRE tomorrow morning and for my health. I've been struggling with some kind of weird allergies/cold thing for a week now. I'm glad it's spring break so I can (hopefully) get healthy, but not feeling well really has me dreading this early exam tomorrow. I'm at the point now where I don't care anymore and I just want it to be over with. I do want to do well, but I also just want it to be over with. Say a prayer for me at 8am if you would.

Once it's over and I'm on to my next project...the paper for my application...I will blog more about the Lent season.

Be blessed

A few days in

2011-03-12T20:20:00.003-05:00

So what do people do when they don't have facebook? They try to make better use of their time. Did I do a perfect job of that and study as hard as I could for my GRE? No. But I did better than I would have if I had a computer, much less was getting on facebbok. It's been another good lesson to learn. One more week until I take the exam. I'm not feeling so great from all the germs floating around school, so please pray I don't get sick.

Ash Wednesday

2011-03-09T20:37:00.001-05:00

Day 1 down. So far, so good :) I'm realizing just how much time I waste online, and not on facebook. Guess it takes a fried computer to teach me that. Go figure

Fat tuesday

2011-03-08T19:25:00.002-05:00

The subject of sacrifices is touchy when you should be excited about observing lent and giving up something but you're typing your blog out on a little iPod touch. Would I be a bad person if I said I was over it and tired of learning? :) after having a fried computer and not knowing when it will be replaced has given me this "over it" feeling. Then I feel bad about complaining. Needless to say, the Lenten season will be beneficial. I'll try to blog some during the season and let you know the goings on in our lives and the lessons learned. Things to pray for now though.. My GRE and raul's midterms.

where'd February go?

2011-03-01T20:27:00.004-05:00

Not really sure where February went, but it seems like I blinked and it's March already. Probably a lot of that had to do with all the snow and weird weather, in addition to things going on at work and my parents leaving for Florida. It was a busy month.

I'm probably turning into the queen of the procrastinators and not ending my 20's on a good note into "true" adulthood. My GRE studying is practically nonexistent. I've probably really studied once in the past 2 weeks. Sad. If we get the weather they say we're going to on Saturday and Sunday (tons of rain), I'm going to hibernate and study...in theory. I haven't touched my research for my paper or even figured how to even organize it. I'm just...I'm not in the mood. That sounds awful, but unfortuantely it's true. So instead, the GRE will probably end up on a wish and a prayer before the 19th, and the paper will be put on the back burner until spring break in 3 weeks. then there's my actual application, personal statement, references, getting transcripts from IWU. Lots to do.

God has been teaching me so much lately (there's that prayer for Him to do a new thing in 2011...He's been hard at work, that's for sure). So much of it has come from everything at church...Sunday school, the Sunday services, and what my growth group is studying. It's really amazing how God has orchestrated all 3 of those aspects to mesh together so well into one big tug at my heart. But something else He's been showing me in my personal life is the idea of sacrifice and giving up things that are important to me. One, though it may seem silly, was our trip to Florida with my parents. It didn't work out, much to our disappointment, and though I understand why...no one likes missing out on a vacation that you look forward to every year. The other part of this lesson in sacrifice is Lent. Starting next Wednesday and until Easter, I (and Raul) will be giving up facebook. I've heard of friends doing this before and how good it was to engage in real connections with people, and not just on facebook. I need that in my life. After years of living behind a firewall where internet activity was restricted, it may be crazy to voluntarily give up something internet-related, but you know...I'm actually looking forward to it. I haven't forgotten that it's coming up in less than a week, and I realize that my birthday falls during that 40 days, but you know what...I survived 25 birthdays without facebook. It's just fine :) If you want to reach me at all, you'll have to do it the old-fashioned way...email or cell phone :)

I love winter, but...

2011-02-07T19:28:00.003-05:00

I think I'm over it. That's saying a lot, because I really do love winter and snow and cold weather and all that....but I'm over it. Last week with the ice storm and preparing for power outages kinda put me over the top. Then coming back to 6-8 inches of snow after we were in Ohio and they had some interesting weather there. Remember, I love winter, I loved having 4 (yes, 4) days off last week to study for my GRE and research my paper and spend time at home...but enough was enough after that. Yet, I cannot let all that pass without praising God for keeping us safe during the ice storm and keeping our power on. Practically the entire state was preparing for the worse, especially our area of the state after the power outage of 2005, and our family never lost power...so so thankful that after preparing for the worst, we were spared. We still had to dig ourselves out of at least an inch of ice and more snow, but at least we had a warm house to go back into after we shoveled.

There are other things going on besides the weather, I guess :) I'm studying for my GRE that I will be taking on March 19th. Some people think I'm nuts for spending money to prepare for the test (I got 2 used prep books on amazon), but I'll tell you, the review is helpful. It's all pretty overwhelming, and I'm getting anxious to get it over with. After that test, I'll start working on the actual application to grad school at Ball State. Part of that application includes a "scholarly work" of about 8-10 pages on an area within my field. So, I chose to write a paper on modern ESL in China and Li Yang Crazy English. Should be an interesting paper, something I'm finding more info on everyday it seems. How I'll turn it into an actual paper, I have no idea. Pray for me :) I'd really like to start school by next semester, so I have a lot to do.

Meanwhile, Raul is doing really well with classes. I married a smart guy :)

2011

2011-01-17T19:24:00.002-05:00

I have this strong desire to see God move and work in 2011.

I know He is constantly at work all around us. He is doing things we're not even aware of. But it's my prayer that He will move and work in my and my family's lives this year. There has been so much going on that I know we on earth cannot control...only He can. And I've found myself praying over and over again for every circumstance that we're going through for Him to move to take control. For Him to change hearts and lives. For Him to take people out of the darkness they've been in for so long. For Him to give us discernment, wisdom and patience. For Him to touch my friends who are hurting and desire for His touch in their lives, for Him to reach out and reveal Himself to them, to restore their faith. For Him to be the Lord of my life, to make me into the woman He knows I can be. For Him to have His way.

The world seems like a mess lately. People point fingers and place blame. Wars are still being fought. People all around the world are suffering because of war, famine, natural disasters. There is corruption and unGodliness all around us.

My comfort? That I serve a God Who is on the throne. He has His hand in it all and is alive and working all around us. He is doing a new thing, I know He will do amazing things in 2011.

Christmas break part 3

2011-01-10T15:06:00.002-05:00

I'm a little slow...about week or so slow...on posting photos of the rest of break, so here they are.

New year's weekend we were in Ohio. Thursday and into Friday we were in Ashland spending time with the Whitmores and my step-grandma, Avie. On Friday morning/afternoon we went to Amish country for some shopping. Then we were off to Columbus to see the Himeses for new year's eve and a little Columbus shopping on Saturday morning before we headed home. It was a tiring 3 days, but a good 3 days :)

this wasn't technically during break, but Ohio State played in the Sugar Bowl on Tuesday, the 4th, against Arkansas. OSU won :)

and this doesn't have a lot to do with break, but these were taken during break :) Raul's favorite thing to cook lately is tocino, and it's a favorite in this house as far as Filipino food :)

and yes, it's yummy! it's beef cubes marinated in tocino powder marinade (bought at the Asia Mart in Indy) and fried.

Christmas break part 2

2010-12-26T18:03:00.002-05:00

Christmas Eve with the Whitmores...Brandon came up for the afternoon and dinner

then we opened presents...I had a few favorites (I loved all my gifts) and these 2 were just about the top of the list...Mary Beth Chapman's new book (started it yesterday and love it) and a Going Home Barbie (I said Welcome Home Barbie on fb...that was wrong). I'd first read about it in an issue of Marie Claire a few months ago. They are given to families who adopt Chinese babies and stay at a certain hotel in Guangzhou or Shenzhen. This particular doll my mom found for me on ebay is from the hotel in Guangzhou. I think it's pretty special to have one, and along with Mary Beth's book, it was a great gift :)

after presents and stockings, we went to the Walkway of Lights in Marion. Here's a photo of one of my favorite displays, Shepherd Kneeling at the Cross

and...Christmas morning :)

Christmas was a pretty low-key day. Slept-in, watched the dogs play with their new toys :) , watched some Christmas specials I had dvred, then Raul and I went into Marion and saw Voyage of the Dawn Treader. Awesome, awesome movie and definitely one to see in the theater. Then, with Mom and Dad, we had Christmas dinner at a Chinese buffet in Marion. :)

I pray you all have had a blessed Christmas and have a great ending to 2010!

photos of Christmas break, part 1

2010-12-23T09:49:00.002-05:00

How we've spent our break so far...

seeing Christmas lights in downtown Indianapolis...one of the many reasons I love that city :)

seeing the Jingle Rails exhibit at the Eiteljorg Museum in Indy...scale models of sites all over the US and train models that run alongside

making Christmas cookies :)

and making our first-ever gingerbread house :)

gettin' in the Christmas spirit...and grad school

2010-12-11T20:59:00.001-05:00

I was looking back over my posts from last year and realized that I'm in a similar situation this year. I look for anything to get me in the Christmas spirit. The main thing being that I participate in the holiday rush of shopping, and I do it willingly. I say willingly because I had (for the second year in a row) finished most of my shopping early, but I still want to participate in something that I feel makes me very American...going along with the masses and shopping!

This is a big deal for me. After 5 years of living in the world's most populous country and becoming somewhat claustrophobic as a result, I try to avoid crowds. But for the Christmas shopping season, I've made an exception. Exhibit A: going to Darlingtons warehouse shop in Ft. Wayne the 2nd weekend it was open. Exhibit B: shopping on Black Friday. I didn't go at 4am or anything, but I did make it into a mall and shop in 3 stores (and I did buy several things). Exhibit C: going back to Darlingtons yesterday, 2 weeks before Christmas. mass chaos. Exhibit D: going to Ft.Wayne's Glenbrook mall 2 weeks before Christmas...even more mass chaos. Gooodness. Malls are craaazy this time of year! Nevertheless, it's all part of it. And I'll admit, I loved every bit of it. :)

Things I love right now that put me in a good mood:
- the little Buckeye Christmas tree I decorated
- the Charlie Brown Christmas tree my mom bought ;)
- the Glee Christmas album...and the Glee Christmas episode this past week
- quoting lines from "Elf" or "A Christmas Story"
- and it's not related to Christmas at all...but the show The Sing Off is really great. If you haven't seen it yet, it's just...it's wonderful. Pure, unaltered voices with no instrumentation...a-ma-zing.

And the other part of this blog post....After a recent turn of events and a door that has more or less closed for me, grad school has been taken off the back burner and put up front again. I had moved it back until Raul had finished school for several reasons, but this past Thursday, God showed me that maybe this is the time for me to pursue it at a nearby uni. I still have a lot to do, such as studying for and taking the GRE, applying...you know, all the important stuff. So for all I know, it could take until Raul finishes school for all this to happen, but I'm going to start as soon as possible. Pray for us that this is the right step for this time in our lives and that I'm not rushing things.

I pray you all are enjoying this Christmas season, and for our Nanjing, that even though the season is kind of lost in China, you can take some time away with your family and friends to enjoy what it's really about.

winter's already here...now it's time for Christmas break

2010-12-06T19:57:00.004-05:00

Gosh I'm a bad blogger.

There's been lots going on in my family, and some of it has been too personal to share on a blog. But prayers for my family would be appreciated.

In other news...I'm praying for new opportunities. We'll see what doors God opens up, how He opens them, and when. I'll keep you posted. Please pray that as much as I want these doors to swing wide open, His will would be done for us. He knows what we need.

He also knows I'm ready for a vacation. Once Thanksgiving is past, the Christmas decorations have gone up, and it gets colder, I'm ready for a vacation. It's really cold, pretty snowy...and pretty early. This kind of weather doesn't usually hit til January. It's making us all the more ready for a vacation, me thinks. I've already watched 3 Christmas movies, made chocolate covered pretzels...that's Catie itching for Christmas break :) My Christmas cookie decorations and icing, the cookie cutters, and my gingerbread house kit are all staring at me, waiting to be used. Just need the time to do it :)

how it goes

2010-11-16T20:12:00.003-05:00

So the Experiment in Thankfulness is definitely a process. It proves that being in a state of thankfulness and not complaining really is a choice every single time you open your mouth or have a thought about something. It's tough...but He's been convicting me left and right, bringing down my pride, and showing me that I complain and have negative thoughts an awful lot. That's not to say that I'm not a thankful person, because I really believe I am. But my complaining and negative thoughts tend to be on overdrive sometimes. It sounds so bad...but that's because it is. If there's a sin that we all struggle with but are reluctant to admit, it's that of complaining and negative thoughts. If you think of it, please pray for me. I've struggled a lot in the past week with all of this and could use your prayers.

Things I'm thankful for this week:
-the change of seasons. I love the colder weather, especially after an especially long bout with warm weather that was really hard on my health (and many others')
-my cousin Hallie. She's been serving in the military overseas for awhile now and comes home on Saturday. I'm really proud of her for serving her country for as long as she has.
-my job. Some days are still better than others (it will probably always be that way), but I'm still thankful for a job that challenges me to be a better, more patient, more understanding person. I'm not there yet, but this job definitely pushes me to be.
-my husband. He studies his butt off and is a straight A student. I could not be more proud. And, he still manages to show me a lot of love and support while he's studying his butt off :)

And lots of other things. God's blessed me so so much.

be ye thankful

2010-11-01T16:39:00.002-04:00

Everytime I think about writing a blog, I realize that what I really want to write about it just too much to write on a public blog. I'll say though that I'm dealing with some sinful emotions, envy and some discouragement. I know that God has provided for every single need we have, giving us so much support and love and understanding from our family, but it doesn't stop the other feelings. And as much as I know that everything happens in His timing, as much as I pretend that I'm really okay with waiting for "things to happen"...it's hard. I guess it's interesting that this is happening as our church is starting a month-long Experiment in Thankfulness, a commitment to NO COMPLAINING for the month of November. Lord, help me to be thankful for what I have, to not be envious of others, and to praise You for Who You are, what You've done in my life, and how far You've brought me.

fall break weekend, Halloween at the Ft. Wayne Children's Zoo (a favorite place to go with my family when Brandon and I were kids)

beautiful Lake James at Pokagon State Park

photos of what's been happening

2010-10-11T21:04:00.002-04:00

I'm such a bad blogger. I'll try to write something substantial soon. For now, I'll let some photos tell a story.

On October 2nd, we went to see the Gaither Vocal Band in concert at my alma mater, Indiana Wesleyan, during homecoming weekend. This was an amazing concert where the vocal band did a full, amazing amazing concert, and the IWU chorale plus alumni performed as well as backed up the vocal band on a few songs. I cried through a few songs but was mostly just awed by hearing one of my all-time favorite groups for the first time. Really, it was a night I won't forget.

the Gaither Vocal Band and the IWU chorale and alumni

the current "All-Stars" vocal band, Bill Gaither, David Phelps, Mark Lowry, Wes Hampton, and Michael English

fall is here! though the temperatures have been way too high to enjoy some fall things, we were still able to go to an apple orchard and pumkin patch

gorgeous gorgeous fall in Indiana :)

one of my favorite photos to take is fall colors on trees...especially when they reflect in a pond or a lake. I love this photo because at first glance, you're not sure if the photo is upside down or right side up.

how it's going

2010-09-21T19:32:00.002-04:00

On this my mom's birthday (happy birthday Mom!), I decided to grace you with an update. I'm sorry I stink at writing lately. I'm seriously debating whether or not to keep the blog going. Part of me definitely thinks I should because there's still so much more to our story, as Raul goes through school and we actively wait for "life on our own again". The other part says, "you don't want to become one of those bloggers that writes once a month, and when you do, it's boring". I'm torn. So I promise that even though I may not blog all the time, I will try to blog more than once a month and write blogs that are somewhat interesting.

The school year is moving right along. Though it doesn't seem possible, we've been back for 5 1/2 weeks, and the way I count that in my head is by the names of certain people we've had in and out of our room working those 5 1/2 weeks. Isn't that sad? But so it is in the room this year. We've had our ups and downs, but I can safely say that the routines are getting set and we're all (students included) well on our way to become fully adjusted. It's taken a lot of work, and some handle it better than others (students, I mean), but we're getting there. We've seen some new behaviors from a couple of students, and some old behaviors from a teacher (my impatience is back). But His presence is definitely felt every single day in my life. I honestly don't know how I could get through it without Him helping me along. There are days where I get out of bed and just don't have a mental or physical strength....but the Father gets me through. And there days (almost every, in fact) where I walk home with Raul and just feel exhausted and don't want to do anything but fall in bed...but the Father shows me how important quality time with my husband and parents is in the evening.

I'm glad I'm working with a coworker from last year as well as a new coworker this year. And though I miss last year's group of girls, I'm really thankful He's taking me out of that "comfort zone" of sorts and bringing something new.

So, all in all the year is starting off well. We're all getting ready for Museum Days (James Dean Days) this weekend, and I'm really looking forward to it. Something else I'm really looking forward to? Cooler weather. I'm over the heat and summer and ready for fall.

photos from Indy Zoo

2010-09-07T19:56:00.001-04:00

After a crazy first 3 weeks of school, we were pretty excited about a 3-day weekend for Labor Day. With so many changes going on, kids getting sick and teachers not feeling well, we couldn't wait for a little break.

The whole weekend was pretty busy, but Monday was my favorite part. We went with Mom and Dad to the Indianapolis Zoo.

with Dad at the penguin exhibit

at the shark touch pool. it took me awhile to get up the guts to actually touch one, but when I finally did, it was pretty cool :)

and what I was most excited about, the cheetah exhibit. even laying down, they're so beautiful

with zebras in the background

been awhile

2010-08-24T19:37:00.002-04:00

Sorry I haven't written in awhile.

In all the waiting I was doing to hear if I had a job or not, we went back to the state fair for some concert fun(Kris Allen and Keith Urban...awesome awesome) with my good friend Destiny and her mother-in-law. I had missed her (and my other 2 coworkers) over the summer. And the following day, we all got together (the Life Skills room) with our students, their parents, the principal, and the new teacher. It was there that I found out I indeed did have a job for the school year.

Though it's the second week of school and the kinks still haven't been worked out in my job (there are lots of kinks to work out in our room, though), I'm thrilled to be back at work. There comes a time during the summer where even the teachers are ready to go back, and I hit that point awhile ago...and not just because I needed a paycheck. I couldn't wait to get back to my students.

So this second week of school...I'm still happy to have a job. I'm still happy to be with my students (most of them ;) . And I'm happy to work with the people I do. But it's definitely going to be a year when I need to daily ask Him for a shower of grace. I actually used that phrase yesterday, and it's so true. This year is bringing a whole new set of challenges and changes in our room that are hard to get used to and require lots of adjustment. So that extra measure of grace and His strength is needed each and every day. But no matter what, I'm so thankful to Him that I do have a job...a job where I feel a purpose, where I know beyond a shadow of a doubt why He has placed me there. And I'm so excited to see what He wants to teach me this year.

Now that I've said all that....

Is it Christmas vacation yet?

;)

almost a year

2010-08-09T20:51:00.002-04:00

Has it really almost been a year since we moved to the US? Really?

I've thought about this a lot lately. There are days where it feels like we just arrived yesterday. There are days where 5 years in China feels like a dream. It's weird.

Yesterday, Mom, Raul and I went to up to Goshen, IN to see Kennedy, Maryann, and Tehillah who are in town for a few days and staying with a couple who are also former Nanjingren, the Dodds. We only spent 2 hours with them, but I'll tell you...it was something that (other than seeing Jamie) I had waited all summer for. Back in June when people asked what I was doing this summer, I included seeing some of my best friends in the last of activities. And I could hardly wait til the time came to see them. Yesterday as we were driving up Indiana 15 towards Goshen, I got more and more excited. I wondered how it would feel to see them "out of context", outside of China. It was the same when we saw Jamie. And it was the same 6 years ago when I saw a friend I'd made in Spain when we visited together in the US (she was also a short-term missionary there). It always feels strange seeing people outside of the foreign country where you met and spent so much time together. And it felt equally weird (good weird) when we saw the Mwenyas. The first to give me a hug was Tehillah, and y'all....I'd missed that little girl, and I still do. She's grown up so much, it's amazing. Then to hug her mom and dad...it felt like no time had past. You fall right back in sync, sharing China stories, catching up (though you've emailed each other back and forth for the past year), and it's as if time just kinda stands still for 2 hours.

Seeing them and Jamie a couple of weeks ago was exactly what our hearts needed. We love being here, but, as we said yesterday when Mrs. Dodd asked if we missed China, we miss the relationships immensely. We miss the NICF and the ministries there. We miss our students at NEIS. I miss my old students at CPU that I would still visit with from time to time.

In addition to missing the relationships in China... If I'm being honest, I miss the idea of China, that time in my life where I was a teacher overseas, part of a group of expats who move out of their home country who came back and was behind on some technology, pop culture, idioms, and all those things that make a person part of a culture. There are times where I don't like slipping back into my American-ness, where I dislike the consumerism, the politics, the "stuff marts", and some things that are quintisential America. I liked being in a country where I was an expat and was just able to live and observe the culture around me. Here, I feel like I'm sucked back in.

This probably all sounds horrible, but some who read this may understand. And I'm probably not expressing it well at all, so please don't misunderstand. I love my country, I love America and what it stands for, the hope it gives people who come here for opportunity and freedom. I love so many things about my country. But sometimes I wish I could go back.

2010-07-29T10:17:00.003-04:00

Well as far as things go, you didn't think July could get more interesting after all the fun in Tennessee and Ohio, did ya? :) Well, it did.

Last weekend, Mom, Raul, and I went on a road trip 6 hours west to the tiny town of Mount Sterling, Illinois. Why on earth would we go there? ;) Well, to see one of my best friends, of course! My gal pal Jamie and her fiance Levi (also an American/Filipino relationship, if you must know) were in the states visiting and planning their wedding which will be in the US in January of next year. Levi left yesterday while Jamie is here for a bit longer. And we were able to see them both last weekend.

I haven't *really* been to Illinois in awhile (I've been told Chicago doesn't count, and I understand why) in many years, but now I see a state that could possibly be flatter than Indiana...if that's even possible :) At any rate, it was a pretty (although pretty boring) trip through the heartland and into the tiny towns that make up western Illinois, Lincoln country. If for no other reason than to see Jamie and Levi get married, I want to go back and visit all of the historical spots, namely the Lincoln spots in Springfield, including the presidential library, museum, and house.

Anyway. So we got to Illinois on Friday afternoon and spent some time with our friends and Jamie's parents before they were going to have a massive amount of people descend on their house that night. We then headed out to find dinner and ended up at a small, though very good, Chinese restaurant in Rushville, where our motel was located. It was a fun little find, run by a family from Fuzhou (not Cantonese like many restaurant owners). The smallest ones are usually the most authentic, and this one was no exception. The owner tried to talk to us in Chinese for a bit, but like many others back in China, she thought my Chinese was better than it actually is. And since her English isn't very good, she thought we were foreigners she could communicate with. Wrong. But we did have a nice time meeting her, her mother, and her kids. And we even got Jamie's family to go there, too. Just call us their p.r. people :)

Saturday, Raul and I spent the whole day at Jamie's while Mom relaxed but then came over for a Filipino dinner that night. Raul and Levi spent time together, chatting and cooking, while Jamie and I did our fair share of chatting, catching up, and drinking massive amounts of coffee over the dining room table. We talked about wedding plans and all the ideas she had. I'm so excited about this wedding. Hard to believe, but this is the first time I've ever been a bridesmaid. I've sung in weddings, done guestbooks, but I've never been a bridesmaid, so I'm pretty excited about this one. The girls are wearing qipaos (Chinese dresses) and the guys are wearing barongs (Filipino shirts)...definitely a combination of cultures and influences. Pretty excited. So we did some online browsing and I introduced her to the lovely world of World Market and Christmas Tree Shops to get more ideas for decorating.

That night we shared a Filipino meal with the boys, my mom, and Jamie's parents. It was so sad to say goodbye after that, but this next period of time we'll be apart is only 6 months, and if it's anything like the past year, it'll go by really quickly.

There are many reasons why I love my friendship with Jamie, other than the fact that there's another Filipino/American relationship :) Most of all, I love how God brought us together. We barely met back in 2004, my first year in China (I can still remember the day Roz introduced me and Jamie). Then after years in different cities, her being back in the US for a year, then reconnecting when she came back to Nanjing, our friendship really grew. Being able to connect through our intercultural relationships also helped our bond. But even more than that, it's amazing to me how you can go all the way to the other side of the world and meet someone who lives 6 hours from you. You have so many things in common, yet God reveals even deeper things to you as you get to know one another. He uses your circumstances and similarities to minister to the other person and teach you so much. I don't know how she feels, but I know that her friendship to me has been such an incredible blessing. I love her dearly.

On a different note to let you know where we are right now....
Having a whole lot of down time this summer, much too much time to miss China friends and pine for a job for this next school year, I really needed something to energize my spirit and give me a new sense of joy. And God really did that. He didn't just do it through Jamie, but also through encouragement from my parents and Raul. This summer has been tough on us, I'm not going to lie. And it's still not over yet. I don't yet know if I have a job (please Lord let it be so). But I've learned so much about how to lean on Him, how to trust Him, and to know that no matter what, He's in control. He brought us here to the US, He's not going to leave us or forsake us. He knows our needs, and He provides. I hope that you haven't stopped praying for us just because we're no longer in China. I continued this blog because what we're doing in the US right now is still a huge part of our journey, and I felt it was important to let you know that an overseas worker's journey doesn't end when they come back on home turf. Things get tough when you move back, you go through a lot, you question a lot, you wonder if you're making the right decisions, all of that. So please keep praying for us. We still need your support.

Be blessed.

vacation time

2010-07-19T12:39:00.002-04:00

My parents invited us to go on vacation with them this past week, and we had a great time...despite what you may have seen on my facebook :)

We left last Saturday for Gatlinburg/Pigeon Forge, TN. I hadn't been since my first summer back from China in 2005. Raul was looking forward to seeing American mountains with tourist traps thrown in. :) Saturday night we stayed in Gatlinburg at a hotel next to the aquarium and checked out some shops and sights downtown. Sunday afternoon, we moved into a motel in nearby Townsend, further into the mountains. Townsend is a cute little town with a population of about 200 or so people. Almost all of the businesses are family owned, including hotels, restaurants, cabin rentals, and tubing and horseback riding. We stayed at a motel called Docks, right on the Little River. Mom and Dad had one of their cabins that was basically a small cottage with an enclosed back patio and hot tub, and Raul and I were in a standard room. We were able to relax, sit in the river, have cookouts, Dad and Raul went biking, horseback riding, and tubing, and (despite a couple of injuries and not so fun moments) we all had a great time. Then Tuesday night, while we were attempting to go out for ice cream, the van broke down. After calling AAA to have them take it to a mechanic, we were hoping we could still head for Ashland the next morning. No such luck. Wednesday afternoon, we learned the van had to be taken to a dealer for more problem-solving. So were in Townsend for an extra night. And after more prayers, the van was fixed and we were on our way to Ashland at 4:30pm. Soon, we realized the van wasn't totally fixed (problems with the gas tank), but we were able to get all the way to Ohio and pulled into my aunt and uncle's house at 12:30am.

Lots of great things happened in Ashand...getting to see cousins I hadn't seen in years (one is in the service and has been deployed a couple of times over the years, the other got married in 2006 and the last time I saw him he was still engaged), going to Amish country, visiting the Longaberger factory and shops, and spending time with family and attending my family's home church on Sunday.

But what I won't forget about this vacation is what God did. The van broke down in the parking lot of the motel, so we were able to pull it off to the side and get access to a phone and help from the motel staff (our cell phones didn't have a signal most of the time we were there). It could have all happened the following day while were on a highway somewhere in TN, but it didn't. God watched out for us. He blessed us with a motel staff who was willing to relay phone messages for us and help make arrangements for my parents to pick up the van in a town 30 minutes away. There were just lots of provisions along the way, and we're so thankful.

Raul and I are also thankful for parents who understand the situation we're in financially and still wanted us to go on vacation with them. The expenses added up to more than they were planning on,(with the van and extra night at the motel) but they were gracious and handled everything. I'm thankful for parents who are willing to do that.

celebrating Independence Day

2010-07-06T21:08:00.003-04:00

I hope you all had a wonderful Independence Day!

We had a really great weekend with my family, spending time in Fairmount and Indianapolis. Fairmount's fireworks were on Saturday night, but before dusk, some local churches, organizations, and vendors had booths set up at the park. Our church set up a booth sponsored by one of the growth groups called Reverb. They do community outreach, service projects, and odd jobs in the area, so for the celebration, they put together a booth giving away sno cones, glow necklaces, and face painting. I was in charge of the face painting (hadn't done it since my missions trip to Madrid in 2002, but it was fun!). When the booth closed up, we were able to enjoy the fireworks.

doing a little face painting :) tiring, but fun...and I had people of all ages getting their faces painted, too, not just little ones!

enjoying the Fairmount fireworks with my hubby...my first Independence Day at home in 4 years, and his first in the US :)

a little Fairmount fireworks

On Sunday, we had a great service at FWC in the morning. Pastor Al spoke on true freedom that we have as Americans, then ended with his main focal point, where true freedom comes from: in Christ. It was such a great service and ended with the congregation singing God Bles America. I was in tears through most of it and after the service. Between that song and the national anthem (especially at baseball games for some reason), I tear up a lot. After being gone for so long, those moments tug on my heartstrings, and I know I'm not the only one.

That afternoon, we met my brother in Indy and celebrated his birthday (today actually) as well as the 4th and had lunch at Cheesecake Factory, shopped a bit, then had a cookout at his apartment for dinner before heading downtown for Indy's fireworks.

I'm so blessed that Raul and I were here this 4th of July. For my husband, an immigrant, it was special to celebrate the national holiday of a country that has become dear to him. For me, an expat who has come home, it was special to be back home in a free country and to share the "special-ness' of the holiday with my husband and my family.

Baxter Family Reunion

2010-06-25T10:22:00.003-04:00

So if you're familiar with Karen Kingsbury's Baxter Family books, you know the Baxters, what they're all about, and how amazing they are. If you're not...you probably wonder, as a lot of people did, what Karen was doing having a reunion for a fictional family. But that's what happened. And it was a fun 2 days :)
The Baxter books and Above the Line series take place in Bloomington, IN, just 2 hours from where we live. So Karen Kingsbury decided to have an event, essentially a glorified book party for this new release that came out Tuesday...

It started Tuesday afternoon at a walking trail near downtown Bloomington where Karen had provided the backing for a bench along the trail. There was a ribbon-cutting ceremony and speeches by Karen and the mayor of Bloomington. He spoke about the effect Karen's have had on the city of Bloomington, then he declared June 22 Karen Kingsbury Day in Bloomington. This is a photo of Karen holding the certificate presented to her by the mayor.

the ribbon-cutting. Her daughter and son held the ribbon on both sides.

the park bench

It turned out to be the best idea to go. There weren't a lot of people there, and there were a couple thousand the rest of the reunion, so it was best time to meet her and get a photo with her. And we did. I was able to tell her how much the Baxter series impacted me while I was overseas, how the books really got me through 5 years in China and reminded me so much of home, since I'm also from a small town in Indiana. I know she hears those kinds of things all the time, but she was still happy to know the impact her books have made, and I just wanted to tell her from my heart how much they've meant to me. It was such a joy to meet her. So this is a photo of me and my mom with Karen Kingsbury.

Tuesday night, probably close to 2000 people gathered at the auditorium on the campus of Indiana University for a book release party/performance/sharing time by Karen. She shared stories and memories from the books. She told stories about the process of writing the books (my favorite was when she was writing about the death of the character Irvel and how it emotional it was for her...so much so that her husband thought she was crazy. "Honey, why are you so upset? You killed her!"). She read 2 of the children's books that she's written. Her kids, Ty and Kelsey performed. It was a great night.

Then the next day, we went to a picnic at Dunn Meadow on the campus of IU. Karen was available to meet people for hours (in the hot sun) while people played games and read books...just enjoying the outside and meeting new people who also shared a love for Karen Kingsbury.

It was a great 2 days. I finished Take 4, the newly released book, yesterday, and was not disappointed. It was yet another great book. And I shared last night at the women's Bible study how the 2 days and meeting her affected me. It really was something I'll never forget.

what's up lately

2010-06-21T10:18:00.002-04:00

A year ago today, Raul and I were in Guangzhou and it was the day before the big visa interview. A year ago tomorrow, Raul had his interview and got the visa that would allow us to come to the US. In other words, it was a day where our lives changed drastically.

It's hard to believe that it's already been a year. God has brought us through so much to bring us to this point, and though it hasn't always been an easy process, I'm thankful that we did it and that we made the step to move to the US. But it never would have happened if God hadn't completely blessed Raul's interview and we hadn't gotten the visa on our first try.

This past Saturday, Raul and I joined Mom and Brandon for a last-minute day trip to Chicago. Brandon is a collector of autographs and other collectibles and was seeking an autograph from Robert Downey Jr. to add to his collection. Downey was to be in Chicago accepting an award, so B wanted to meet him at the hotel and get him to sign something. Since a friend couldn't go, we 3 decided to join him and go shopping while Brandon waited at the hotel. At 7 :00, Brandon hadn't gotten him to sign anything (bummer) but did get some photos of him (favorable). We felt bad for him, but it wasn't a totally wasted trip. Mom, Raul and I got to walk a bit down Michigan Ave. then took a taxi over to Navy Pier. I hadn't been there in years (since Dana and I met up) and Raul had never been, so we had fun. Raul had his first experience at Build-a-Bear :) and we had some yummy food at the food court. All in all, though it was s short trip, it was fun. See facebook for photos....

And now I head into the busy part of our summer. Tomorrow, my mom, aunt, and I will go to Bloomington for 2 days for a Karen Kingsbury event. If you're familiar with her Baxter family books, you might appreciate the event we're attending, Baxter Family Reunion. Bloomington is where the books take place, so that's where it'll be held. Then Friday, we're off to Columbus with Mom and Brandon to see my aunt and uncle and spend some time with them. Then a week back at the summer laziness...then 4th of July, which is always a fun time and something I'm really excited about (think we'll be watching the fireworks in Indy). Then the next weekend we're headed on vaction with my parents...and it all starts to get busy from that point on. Hopefully at some point we'll be able to see the Mwenyas and Jamie who are headed back to the states for vacation, too. Lots going on!!

Indiana summer

2010-06-16T14:37:00.005-04:00

Having not been in the US for an Indiana summer in 4 years, I forgot how weird it can be. Storms, nasty humidity, heat, random bits of scorching sun... I though Nanjing was bad! But I will say, at least here there is proper air conditioning. I've never been more thankful for a/c in my life. But the storms have been interesting lately. For 4 days in a row, there were thunderstorm warnings over most of the state and some pretty serious flooding and wind damage. Despite all that, our almost 150 year old house still stands :) But our border collie, Dulcie, had a rough time of it. She's terrified of storms and spent many nights either in the corner behind the door of the bathroom, in my parents' closet, or in her new spot as of last night, behind Raul's and my bedroom door. I feel sorry for her, but it's pretty funny :) I think she's happier than any of us that the sun is finally out...and the humidity isn't even that bad.

In addition to working on my book, I'm also reading quite a bit of books. Some of my most recent reading.... (in no particular order...and don't judge me for some of the selections. there's an eclectic bookshelf to choose from)

I just started this one a couple of days ago...it's my "nighttime reading", so it stays in my bedroom. Big Frank Peretti fan. He writes some really interesting Christian fiction.

I've read several of her books, and I really like them. They don't require a ton of brain power, and that's partly why they make good summer reading.

Another one I'm reading at the moment (yes, for some reason, I read 2 at a time, but very rarely). I've been tackling this one as I sit outside in the sunshine. It's yet another book about China.

once again, a book that doesn't require a lot of brain power, but some of DS's books can be fun reads. Next on my list of hers is the newest, Big Girl.

The tail-end of this book started my summer, and it was such an interesting book. I've become so fascinated with historical books, both fiction and non-fiction, and this one is just great. I've always been fascinated by Lincoln and his assassination (since it took place on my birthday), so I really enjoyed this one. Read it if you get the chance.

and another easy read, a bit "teenager-ish", but a cute book written by Joanna Philbin, Regis Philbin's daughter. Since my mom is an avid watcher of Live with Regis and Kelly, she'd heard about the book. I liked the book and, I'll admit, am looking forward to the rest of the series.

Future summer reading:

Take Four by Karen Kingsbury. Mom, my aunt, and I are headed to Bloomington next week for a 2-day Karen Kingsbury event when the book is released. If you've read any of her Baxter Family books, you'll appreciate the event when I tell you more about it next week :)

Hopefully a Jodi Piccoult book that I can't think of the name of right now, but it's her newest one.

A couple Terry Blackstock books.

And I'm sure several others...it wouldn't an Indiana summer if I didn't read, oh...about 20 books :)

starting

2010-06-09T20:09:00.003-04:00

I hit a milestone.

I started my book. I mean really started it. After months of talking about it, setting it as a goal for my summer, I really started it. And it was more than just picking at it like I have been for the past 9 months. I actually pulled out journals I wrote while in China and have started sticky-tabbing entries I want to use in the writing process. Why is this such a big deal? Because it took me forever just to get to this point. I guess all it took was a vacation to get me motivated. That and 9 months of reflection time.

Today I realized how glad I am I wrote journals obsessively for so many years. If it weren't for my journals, I know those 5 years would be a big blur in my memory. Both my web journals and hand-written ones will be coming in very, very handy. Now if I could just remember how to access that livejournal one I wrote in for awhile...in between when xanga was blocked and I started this one on blogger. Hmm....

the ways He gets our attention

2010-06-04T11:19:00.003-04:00

The women's Bible study I attend on Thursday nights has been studying a book about living above worry and stress. I've considered myself someone who's been doing much better in the worry department lately, but every once in awhile, one of those creeps in... like not being sure whether or not I have a job in the fall. I stress about finances. I stress about when we're going to have our own place and be "independent" again. Those moments don't last too long because I'm getting better about hearing His voice of calm and rest...but the moments are still there, and I don't want them to be there at all.

This week's particular chapter was on "blessings in disguise". It talked about various points in the Scriptures where God used extraordinary things to get the attention of certain people...Jonah and the big fish, Moses and the burning bush, etc. And at the end of the chapter, it asked us what God has used to get our attention lately.

For some reason, the first thing I thought of was all these negative things lately, not giving me a quick answer about my job, making us wait to be on our own, missing friends (particularly as I ended the school year and miss the girls I worked with). All negative things to teach me how to draw closer to Him. But as one lady in the group started sharing about how things like birds singing in trees had gotten her attention lately...I felt ashamed.

I slowly started to realize as I sat there what it was that God was really using to get my attention lately. Things like beautiful sunsets in Indiana that I had missed for so many years. Summer thunderstorms rolling across the fields. A student at school who has this amazing heart for others and wants to help them anyway he can. And a woodpecker. For the past week, we've had a woodpecker in one of the trees in the backyard. I don't remember ever seeing a woodpecker before, and here one just shows up. He's there quite a bit, working on a hole I'm assuming, and I just find it so interesting. He's a smaller than I would have expected, but he can make a lot of noise with his little beak. And if you get right under the tree and look straight up, you can see his little head as he pecks away. It's really neat. And it's just another thing that God has used to get my attention.

What is He using to get your attention lately?

Happy Memorial Day

2010-05-31T08:16:00.002-04:00

With the exception of the Fourth of July, we've now been here for all the holidays, and I'm not sure there are 2 more American holidays than Memorial Day and the Fourth of July. The actual Memorial Day just started this morning, but we already participated in some local activities and went to the Indianapolis 500 Festival Parade, the day before the Indianapolis 500 race. Even though I got sick from dehydration and wasn't fully able to enjoy the parade, it was a really great day in the sun with 300,000 people watching the parade. Raul was able to see a big part of Indiana culture with the 500 and , I think, really enjoyed it :) My parents have video of him dancing to prove it.

With 2 grandfathers and several cousins who have served in the military and one who is currently serving in the middle east, Memorial Day is a special day. And it's even more so after spending 5 years in a country that is not free like the US is. I praise Him that I live in a country where people fight every single day for my freedom.

looking forward to summer

2010-05-12T21:34:00.003-04:00

With only 11 school days 'til summer (we get out June 1), I absolutely can't wait for summer break. I love that we get out a month earlier than Raul and I did in China (sorry Nanjingren that read this...I'm not trying to rub it in). So yeah, Catie's ready for a break. Do I feel slightly lazy for not working this summer? Yeah. But I think I'll get over it quickly. After being in the states for almost 9 months and going through the ups and downs of being back and working a very different sort of job that leaves me exhausted...the summer break is well-deserved I think. I also miss spending time with Raul.

There's more to write, but it's been a long Thursday for me. Goodnight all.

the colors a storm leaves behind

2010-05-04T19:57:00.002-04:00

Isn't His creation amazing? I took these photos last night off the back porch after a thunderstorm. We've had several roll through the past couple days, but last night's left some really pretty colors in the sky. Kinda reminded me of cotton candy :)

2 years ago

2010-05-02T19:47:00.003-04:00

Last Sunday, I went to a bridal shower at our new church. This was the first shower I'd been to since my own, so I was doing a lot of "comparisons" in my head and remembering what it was like overseas, wondering what it would have been like here, etc. Then, yesterday I was looking through my blogs from 2 years ago, before the wedding and after, and remembering what a crazy, crazy time that was for us.

Honestly, there's nothing like the process of getting married. Now multiply that times 10 and you've got what it's like to get married in another country, away from all your family. That alone was a difficult choice, but our families, great as they are, were so supportive. So Raul and I decided, I think even before we got engaged, that we would get married in Nanjing...where we'd met, gone to church, and developed friendships and a new "family" for the past few years. And God honored that decision.

The process was never easy, though. Being foreigners, there was a lot of paperwork to check on and complete before our Christian ceremony. I always had to take someone shopping with me when I wanted to buy wedding decorations or had tailoring appointments for the dresses. Megan, Danielle, and our dear Malaysian friends Jiaxing and Tyanshin (who are also getting married soon) were the biggest helps we could have ever asked for. Mainly thanks to Danielle, I had the most beautiful dress tailored-made for me (who else can say that?) in gorgeous Suzhou satin. Thanks to Megan (and Mrs. Prenevost), I had gorgeous ceremony and reception decorations and Megan's fabulous photography all the way through. Thanks to Jiaxing and Tyanshin, were able to marry in the church where we had first met and use great transportation on our wedding day. Thanks to Maryann and Kennedy, we have a video of our special day. There were just so many people who helped us, I still can't believe it. God knew our need and met us right where we were with so many friends helping us along the way.

All of these are things I will never forget, memories that are forever etched in my mind. But the best memory of all? Marrying my best friend.

small update

2010-04-28T20:31:00.002-04:00

Sorry I've been a bad blogger lately. It's been an interesting week or so of school and things have picked up in the family area as well. Lots of things going on. But here are some quick updates.

-Raul finishes his classes on our anniversary, next Monday, May 3rd. Keep him in your prayers. He's continued to do so well on all of his exams thus far, so I know this one should be no exception, but...well it's always a concern when it comes to finals.

-I'm trying to figure out what to do for the summer. I lack so much motivation to get a job, but we really need the income for the summer. So I'm going to push myself to apply again for the online classes at the Japanese company and teach for them this summer. I got through most of the application process back in October, before my job became a semi-permanent deal, so hopefully I won't have to do much more to get hired. We'll see.

-We've been missing our Nanjing friends lots lately. It took several months for it all to kick in and the "newness" of everything US to wear off, but when it did, we were both hit pretty hard. We're happy in the US, but we miss people who've been a big part of our lives for the past 5 years.

- We finished an amazing book with our Sunday school class, Crazy Love, and it was amazing. Really life-changing. Read it if you have the chance. Or borrow our copy :)

-I'm in the midst of another book study, Lies Women Believe, with the girls at work. It's also amazing and really good stuff. I'm also enjoying the extra fellowship with the girls.

-And lastly, I'm trying to read 2 books at the same time (story of the search for John Wilkes Booth after Lincoln's assassination, and a travelogue on China), in addition to the book study. Never do this. It will hurt your brain.

birthday weekend

2010-04-18T20:16:00.003-04:00

So, I turned 29 last week :) Celebrated a little bit at school, went to dinner with the family at Cracker Barrel, got a birthday cookie at home...and a new camera :)

Then for the weekend, we went to Columbus, OH, to visit my mom's side of the family, do a little shopping at Easton...all good stuff :)

with my cousin, Jennifer

with my Aunt Cindy

dinner at Cheesecake Factory at Easton :) yummy stuff

turning 29

2010-04-13T21:20:00.002-04:00

I'm 29 in a couple of hours...if I was still in Nanjing, I'd already be 29. When did that happen? I blinked and all of a sudden, my 20's are about over. Weeeeeird. I told Raul last night that this is the first year that I really do feel older. I told him "we're going to be 30 soon". And it freaked me out a little bit. No more messing around. Time to be an adult.

But what if I don't want to grow up? ;)

things that make me happy/smile lately

2010-04-07T20:36:00.002-04:00

- Glee is coming back next week (and the day before my birthday!). Anyone else excited about that? The whole cast was on Oprah today and it got me even more excited :)

- The weather last week and the promise that it could be that beautiful again soon. True to Indiana-ness, it's supposed to be cooler tomorrow. But I guess I'm still happy. I love sweatshirt season. It's too early for summer weather.

- One of our family dogs, Sierra, came to school this afternoon to be a therapy dog for the students. They all seemed to really love it, and Sierra loved all the attention. Pretty sure we'll be doing it again a few more times before the year is up. It was just such a joy to see one of our students, who can't communicate verbally, squeal and get so excited to see Sierra. He wasn't too sure about her at first, but I know that the next time she comes in, he'll be much more comfortable with her.

- Raul is making me feel so much pride in the job he's doing with his studies so far. This guy is studying a difficult course in his second language and not only is he acing his exams (!!!!) but he's gotten above 100% on exams because of bonus questions :) I'm a very proud wife. If you know Raul or see him on facebook, encourage him! So proud of my man!

- The ladies I work with. They are the girlfriends I've sort of lost since I moved back to the US. I still miss my NJ girls and my IWU girls I'm slowly losing touch with every day. But these 3 ladies that I work with really brighten my day and encourage me so much. I've been so blessed since that day I started working in October.

What makes you smile lately?

Easter Sunday

2010-04-04T20:20:00.002-04:00

We had a pretty blessed Easter Sunday back in the US. Being a part of a great church service in the morning, having lunch with my parents and Brandon, spending lots of time outside in the gorgeous sunshine...a pretty great way to spend the day :)

outside the house, after the morning service

FWC's Easter choir...Raul and I unfortunately couldn't join because we were gone for 2 rehearsals then sick for the other 2 :p

photo together before church :)

with our Easter baskets from my mom...it's fun to be a little kid sometimes!

1-2-3 list (stolen from Stephanie)

2010-03-30T21:40:00.003-04:00

Joys

1. my husband

2. worship music

3. sunsets and gorgeous, beautiful days...like the ones we're having this week

Fears

1. losing my husband

2. injuring myself so badly that I'd actually have to go to the hospital...weird, but true. never broken a bone, never sprained anything, and never want to. hate pain.

3. never seeing some of my friends in China again

Goals

1. to lose weight. There's no point in setting a goal because it's always been a struggle for me, but I'm trying...it's just slow-going.

2. to grow even closer to Him. I felt like my relationship with the Father took several steps forward when we were in China, but I've felt myself slip back quite a bit since we've been in the US, particularly when it comes to Bible reading and prayer.

3. to start writing this book eventually (could I be more vague?)

Obsessions

1. book ideas

2. learning what He wants me to do once/when/if we move out of Indiana (grad school? church ministry? outreach? who knows?)

3. I want it to be Jesus...especially after reading the chapter on Crazy Love just today that talks about making Him our obsession

spring break part 2

2010-03-25T12:21:00.003-04:00

This week has been my spring break (reminder, our week in Florida was technically Raul's spring break, so I got 2 spring breaks, so to speak). And how have I spent it? Still being sick. It continued off and on since we got back from Florida. The class room was a germ factory last week, so that didn't help. One of our students went home sick on Thursday, and another was pretty sick on Friday. Needless to say...germ factory. I went home Friday on the downward spiral. It developed into a naaasty sore throat that was with me most of the weekend. Sunday I felt yucky. Monday and Tuesday I was home alone while everyone else was at work or school, so I tried to get better. Yesterday I felt pretty good. Raul and I took a walk with Sierra, worked in the backyard, and just enjoyed the sunshine. Then, the cold set in again and Catie woke up feeling poopy again. The sore throat is back with a vengeance as well as more congestion. Yucko. I'm having a blast on my spring break, on top of losing all my contacts and photos on my cell phone after having issues with it yesterday. Grrrr.

On the upside, it's a break. So at least I have the chance to be sick at home and not missing days of work. And, I finished one book, read 2 others, and am getting ready to start a new one. If you know me, this won't come as a shock. I go through books like water, which I'm also drinking a lot of. Nourishment for the mind and body. Yep, that's me! I bought a new water bottle on Saturday (not sure why I didn't do it before) and have been filling it up constantly...my newest addition to trying super hard to start losing some pounds. Here's hoping...

Florida break

2010-03-15T21:19:00.004-04:00

We had a great time in Florida :) If you've seen my photos on facebook, you can probably tell. Despite some off and on sickness being passed around and sunburn (my own stupidity), it was a really nice week.

Saturday: Brandon, Raul, and I flew down to Tampa and met my mom and dad. Dad flew back to Indy an hour later and we went back to Madeira Beach with Mom. We got settled into the unit at the beach club and had dinner at Sweet Tomatoes (awesome restaurant, if you've never been there).

Sunday: Church at the "pink church" in St. Petersburg. Met my extended family (dad's aunt and uncle and cousin and her family) for lunch at a Chinese restaurant. Afternoon in the sun. Sunday was the first warm day Florida had seen in awhile, so the beaches were pretty full. Dinner in.

Monday: Morning and lunch at John's Pass in the gorgeous sunshine. Went to Orlando and passed through strawberry country. Got settled into a "questionable" motel and shopped at an outlet mall and Downtown Disney. Dinner at the T-Rex restaurant at Downtown Disney.

Tuesday: Disney World!!! Mom, Raul, and I went to Magic Kingdom for the morning and afternoon. Rode several rides, went to several shows...so much fun being a kid :) Late afternoon we met up with Brandon (who'd been to all 4 parks by this point) and went to EPCOT for dinner. Raul and I then went to Mexico and Norway in the course of an hour. :) Late night ride back to Madeira Beach.

Wednesday: 80 degree day in Florida. Thus, I spent the whole day in the sun, and paid dearly for it. :p Bad sunburn by the evening and an awkward sleep for the next 4 days.

Thursday: Windy windy day! Lunch at by the beach at Sloppy Joe's, watching the high waves and crazy kite boarders (who got kicked off the beach by the patrol). Rest of the day stayed in, but went to my aunt and uncle's in St. Pete to watch American Idol.

Friday: Rainy day...all day off-on showers. Last minute shopping at John's Pass and lunch at Bubba Gump restaurant. Packing, packing, and more packing.

Saturday: Gorgeous day (of course it's the day you leave) to leave early to head back to Indiana. Brandon drove the whole day while Mom watched 3 of the Harry Potter movies and Raul slept. I sat up front with Brandon and read a new book while listening to the Harry Potter movies. My new book is a sort of autobiography about Temple Grandin, who had an HBO movie about her last month. Great movie, and the book is really interesting, too. Stopped overnight in Chattanooga, TN. Not as warm as Florida :p

Sunday: Too short of a night's rest with DST on top of it. It's the first time I've had to deal with it (Indiana switched to it when I was overseas, so I'm totally not used to it). Brandon drove us all the way to Indiana while Mom watched 2 more Harry Potter movies. Yep! All that's left is the 6th one, which I haven't seen yet either. We made a pit stop at a Starbucks outside Nashville to meet my "old" friend Joanne who I hadn't seen in years, and pretty much the only chance I've had to see her is when we were on our way to or from Florida. It was so great to see her. After dropping Brandon off in Indy later in the afternoon, we made it home to Fairmount around 7pm. Whew!

So far this week, I've had a hard time adjusting being back. The weather has gotten warmer in Indiana, and it's really messing with my health. I never felt great, and today I just felt plain old awful. It was a very long, noisy day, too, and that didn't help. I came home and felt even worse. Even though I already had a spring break of sorts, I'm really glad Park's spring break is next week. I need some rest. But I am so thankful for the 7 days in Florida.

headed to (hopefully) sunny Florida!

2010-03-05T20:41:00.002-05:00

Well, we made it through the week that seemingly never wanted to end. With most of the school going through ISTEP (with the exception of our students) seemed a bit longer, too. I was pretty happy when I realized that today was Friday and I was going on vacation tomorrow.

I'm really looking forward to going back to Madeira Beach, seeing family in St.Petersburg, and spending time in a place that holds so many memories. I know Raul is excited to be on the beach again and see Disney World for the first time. I may try to blog while we're there, but I won't promise anything :)

Be blessed!

2010-02-27T20:34:00.002-05:00

Raul and I are "playing house" for the next week while my parents are in Florida. Mom and Dad are enjoying the first week at the time share in Madeira Beach, then Raul, Brandon, and I will fly down next Saturday for the 2nd week with Mom. I'm getting pretty excited for a week of vacation, especially in (hopefully) sunny Florida. After 6 years...yeah, I'm ready to go :) Just got to get through this week of work, cheering on Raul while he studies, and keeping the dogs cheery as they miss my parents. Pray for us this week. I know we'll be fine, but it's nerve-wracking at times to be here "alone".

will I write a blog? we'll see

2010-02-23T18:50:00.003-05:00

I want to blog. I really do. But I'm trying to clear my head a bit, take a sort of writing break for awhile. That book, that darned book, is still rolling around in my head, and it seems that the longer I wait to write it, the longer it bugs me, and the more I blog, the more I'm reminded that it's all a part of the book that hasn't been written yet. I keep saying that maybe when I'm on spring break I will actually start it, or maybe the summer (but first I need to secure a job). But yeah... I'm starting to lose my passion for writing.

Well, maybe losing my passion isn't the right phrase. It's just that I can't blog a lot about what I want to blog about (privacy issues and all that). If I could blog it all, there'd be some good stuff that I'm sure you'd find interesting, but I just can't.

Nothing like dangling something in front of you only to snatch it away, huh? :)

I'll end with this: I wanted to give up something for Lent, but by the time I realized it was Lent and should've given up something...I lost my motivation. Bad Catie. But I'm working on something a friend talked about in Sunday school class a few days ago. She said she gave up negativity and adds a dollar to a jar for every negative thought. By Sunday, she was up to 6 dollars. Today it hit me that I should give this up for Lent, too. It didn't last long :p It was that kind of day.

snow days leave time to think

2010-02-12T08:58:00.002-05:00

Well, the last time I blogged, I'd had a pretty bad week. Last week was much better...probably because I was barely at school :) After a huuuge amount of snowfall Monday night, we didn't have school for 4 days straight. We're off today for President's Day, so when we (hopefully) go back tomorrow, it'll be a whole week of school that we missed. Like one teacher said on her facebook, it's like spring break in February. Yikes. Not fun for the paycheck either. Anyways. As much as I've loved spending time with Raul and the dogs, I'll be happy to get back to work, too. At least the tiredness I feel at night won't be the lazy tired.

These days off have allowed me time to read, catch up with some friends, and pray about some burdens on my heart. Monday night (my dad's birthday, which I forgot to blog about...sorry Dad!), I called some dear friends in China. Kennedy and Maryann's wedding anniversary was Sunday and their daughter Tehillah's 5th birthday was on Tuesday, so I called Monday night...her birthday morning. It was so cute to hear her voice over the phone, telling me how she's been lately ("Auntie Caitlin, I lost a tooth!") and asking if Uncle Raul and I will come back to China. It was so sweet...I almost did want to go back to China so I could hug her.

If you recently started reading my blogs, you may not know about the special relationship we have with this family. Maryann and Kennedy were our matron of honor and best man for our wedding, and Tehillah was one of our flower girls. They were our coworkers for 3 years, and Kennedy was our teaching director for 2 years. Maryann was one of my closest friends in China, my sister, my confidant...a lot of things to me that I needed, being so far away from home. And Tehillah...as one of the few people who was there the day she was born, I've always considered her a special little person in my life. It's been such a joy to watch her grow up, learn more about Him, worship God with us on the worship team (or in the front row), and see the little lady she is becoming. So I knew we had to call her on a very special birthday. I was also able to catch up with her parents, particularly sharing with Maryann like we used to when I was still in Nanjing.

This conversation with Maryann and then talking later with Raul has brought back the desire to write this book that is still floating around in my head and thoughts on a daily basis. It's made me think more about ministries I want to get involved in, particularly to do with the international church and persecuted Christians. And I'm wondering how I can start now. Since finishing Brother Yun's Heavenly Man, I've felt burdened for how we as the western church should respond. And I'm praying a lot, not sure where this is all leading.

Then yesterday, during both Sunday school and the service, I felt Him tugging at me even more. Our Sunday school class discussed chapter 4 of Crazy Love, talking about the lukewarm Christian and church. Then the assistant pastor spoke on what we should be doing in the world, how we can serve in ministry and pray for Him to show us what He wants us to do and how He wants us to get involved. If I needed more nudging... :)

So needless to say, I'm praying for guidance, wisdom, and discernment. Please pray with me. I'd appreciate it.

sigh

2010-02-05T19:12:00.002-05:00

It was not the greatest work week.

There...now wasn't that the best way to start a blog? I thought so ;)

But it really wasn't. It was stressful. It was frustrating. It was confusing. And then some. The best thing about it? That it's over.

However, I've come to realize that we go through weeks like that for Him to remind us that it's only for a season. I was seriously reminded of this last night during Bible study, and I'm glad I was or I probaby would've lost it. I even debated when I came home yesterday if I even wanted to go to Bible study, but I knew that since our topic is joy, I would get something out of it. And I did. That "only for a season" bit was one of the biggest. And, that it will make me (and my coworkers) stronger in the end. It's a daily battle, but I'm going to do my best to be positive...as hard as it is.

I'm so thankful for the girls I work with in the classroom. They make it so much more bearable, and I know they feel the same. We keep each other sane. Today we even said that we have to laugh at a lot of things that happen lately...because if we don't, we'll probaby end up in tears or punching a wall.

Guess I'll just go watch the pretty snow for awhile :) And pray for my parents who are still on their way home on the dangerous roads...

2010-01-30T21:49:00.002-05:00

I wish I had a lot to blog about...I wish I wish. But I'll tell you something I'm chewing on at the moment.

I'm chewing on a lot lately. Lots of things have me thinking and meditating on what He's revealing. He's been speaking to me through so much lately...our Sunday school class, the new ladies Bible study I've joined, the book I'm currently reading (Heavenly Man by Brother Yun...an absolutely amazing book that I will have to blog a lot about once I finish it), and things at work. I'm working on revitalizing my attitude towards people and circumstances that bug me. We're studying a book called Contagious Joy at Bible study, and this past Thursday during our first meeting, we all shared what brings us joy and what steals our joy. I confessed that my impatience with people and things definitely steals my joy...and He convicted me of that. I'm responsible for allowing my joy to be stolen. Then last night I even had a dream about it...it was so real, I woke up feeling convicted about my attitude. If that doesn't kick ya in the butt at the start of your day...

A very short blog, and I'm sorry.

2010-01-22T18:30:00.002-05:00

I praise God for a week that ended with me wondering where the week went. After a pretty bad week last week, I wasn't so positive going into this week. We had two days with 2-hour delays, were off on Thursday because of ice shtuff, and came back Friday with me thinking "was this a really long week? or did it go by quickly?" I was really confused. We've had a lot going on in the classroom lately (but then again, when do we not?), and need some prayer...lots of decisions to be made. I praise Him that we're seeing some answers to prayers. The rest we may have to wait for.
I'm so thankful for the girls I work with. We keep each other sane for 7 hours at work then go home and then...its our husbands' turn to listen :) I appreciate Raul, too. He's had to listen to all that's going on, and I can see his head spin quite a bit. He's had to hold me as I cried this week, too, but he stuck by me and has always been there for me.

Needless to say, I'm glad it's the weekend. Time to be refreshed and cheer on the COLTS!!!

refresher weekend

2010-01-17T15:31:00.002-05:00

So yeah, last week wasn't the greatest week I've had in awhile. But the weekend certainly made it all better (we'll forget the sinus issues I'm having at the moment). Yesterday afternoon, our family friends Jerry and Claudia went with Raul and me and Mom to the Gaithers' complex in Alexandria. The Gaither Vocal Band has just released 2 new concert dvds with the new-old group (made up of GVB all-stars of sorts...Bill, David Phelps, Michael English, Mark Lowry, and Wes Hampton), and they were premiering the dvds at a special showing in the Gaither studios, right next to the Gaither store and down the road from Bill and Gloria's home (conveniently down the road from my family's home). I'd never been to a premier before, though I'd been to the studio, and I was excited, as was Raul. And we had a great time. Gloria was there to introduce the video, talk a bit about the new group, then we, along with a couple hundred other people, enjoyed an entire GVB video. And let me tell y'all...it doesn't get much better than Gaither Vocal Band music. You may associate all things Gaither with "older" people, and I did for a long time, too, but there's nothing like it in Christian music...or music in general. The first song on the dvd is my all-time favorite Gaither song (and there are many to choose from), Alpha and Omega, and by the end of the song...I was already refreshed in my spirit...and it just got better as the hour and thirty minutes went on.
With all the things going on in my and my family's lives lately, the power of music overcame me yesterday. I worshipped...while watching a concert video. It wasn't even live music, but I felt as if I was there in the San Antonio theater, and I allowed myself to just worship and let Him speak. God showed me who He was in those moments.
Then today, Raul and I went to our second Sunday school class that's been discussing the book Crazy Love. Again, He was speaking. And then the service, our third at the new church...yet again. I'd love to give details and all that, but my heart is just so full and overwhelmed...I'm not sure I'll have the words to describe it.

It was a weekend of blessing. And I'm so thankful.

And I'm also glad the Colts won yesterday :) that made a fantastic weekend pretty darn near perfect :)

2010-01-14T20:47:00.003-05:00

I'm going to ask for your prayers. I've not had the best week at work, and as I try to look forward to Friday and the weekend it brings...I just feel tired. It's not been a fun week at all. We've gotten off routine in the classroom with teachers being out at various points, certain behaviors of students, snow days, and it's just...it's gotten to all of us a bit. I hope I'm not getting sick as well, because that would inconvenience the others I work with (weird way to look at it, but if you were in our room, you'd understand). Just pray that tomorrow will end the week on a higher note and that the weekend will bring some much needed refreshment.

snow days

2010-01-07T15:56:00.003-05:00

I feel like a dork. I've lived in Indiana for pretty much my entire life and totally forgot within 5 years what it looked like when it really snowed. The girls at work are a little surprised at my reaction to all the fluffy white stuff that's been flying around all day. There's a good 4 inches on the ground already, and I don't think it's done yet. Just glad I'm done being out in it, though I wasn't in it much. We went to school this morning, pretty sure our day wouldn't last long, and it didn't. By 10:30, it had been announced that we'd be leaving at 1:15, 2 hours early. Pretty excited :) So now the question is if we'll be cancelled tomorrow. As much as I love snow days, I miss a paid day without school...and we have to make it up. Hmm...how to choose?

Meantime, I enjoyed a couple extra hours at home...and now I'm enjoying Destiny's homemade hot chocolate that she had extra batches of. And, I'm enjoying watching the pretty snow as I pray for those out in it. Stay safe on the roads, y'all!

Few photos for you...

puppies trying to figure out what to make of all this snow :)

Raul went for a walk while I was at school...not sure how, but he did :) this would be Main Street, Fairmount

the Fairmount Museum, all pretty and covered in snow

end of Christmas break

2010-01-04T12:52:00.003-05:00

After not having a Christmas break for so long, it was nice to have 2 weeks and a couple days off. We go back tomorrow, and I'm feeling pretty excited about it. It's not that I don't love being home with Raul while he still has free time, but there is such a thing as too much time at home...I need to get back into a routine. And, Raul only has one more week before his classes start, so I won't feel like I'm abandoning him. In some ways, it felt a lot longer than 2 weeks, even though we were busy most of the time. Several trips to Indy, a couple of movies, lots of shopping, Christmas programs...busy busy time.

And the new year has started off pretty well. The Buckeyes are Rose Bowl champions, making it a great New Year's day in the Whitmore/Kaparaz house. I got a new hair cut (not as short as last year's, but still short...and I like it :) We helped our friend Joshua move into his new place in Indy (on a very very cold Saturday, I might add). And Raul and I started going to a new church. It's actually not new to me, having lived beside it for almost my entire life. But it's a new experience for us, new people, new ministries to be involved in, new opportunities. And though I think we were both nervous, He of course went ahead of us...and we had a great first Sunday there. So yeah, 2010's off to a pretty good start :) Let's hope it continues as I go back to school and Raul starts school.

2010-01-01T12:58:00.003-05:00

Probably no one but myself will find this interesting, but I saw it on a friend's blog and thought I'd also do it...helps to recap, to remember where you came from and how far you've gone in 10 years...

2000 - freshman/sophomore year at IWU. I had changed from a music ed major to English ed. I finished my years working at Elder-Beerman and got more involved in IWU res life, with FNL and University Singers.
2001- sophomore/junior year at IWU. After a life-changing summer with conference services at IWU, I found my calling in missions and changed my major to intercultural studies, one of the best decisions I ever made. More involvement in campus ministries, working with new student orientation and FNL, University Players...busy busy.
2002 - junior/senior year at IWU. Went on the World Impact trip to Madrid. I felt a strong tie to the city and knew I wanted to go back. Was a student director for conference services and discovered some leadership qualities I had no idea I had. Moved into a townhouse and started a very fun, of course busy, senior year at IWU.
2003- senior year/internship at IWU. I finished my last semester on campus, worked another summer in IWU's conference services, then spent 4 months in Spain. I was an intern with OMS International's ESL ministry in Madrid. It was a life-changing experience. I fell in love with missions and ESL ministry in particular, and I knew there was something special for me to do with my life. In December, I officially graduated from Indiana Wesleyan University.
2004- I was a substitute teacher for Madison-Grant and Lakeview while figuring out what to do next. Decided maybe China was the way to go and moved to Nanjing, China, in August. I took a job at China Pharmaceutical University. In October, I joined the Nanjing International Christian Fellowship, another life-changing decision.
2005- Officially became a worship leader at the NICF, yet another life-changing move for me. I decided to stay another year in China, working at CPU, then took a part-time job at a language center. Went home to the US for a bit during the summer.
2006- Went to Seoul, Korea, for a vacation in the winter. Decided that CPU was no longer the place for me and decided to join the teaching team at NEIS. Went home for 6 weeks during the summer and saw my beloved grandfather for the last time...he passed away in August. And, I met the love of my life, Raul :) Dated for most of 2006, long-distance, visiting each other as often as we could.
2007 - Raul moved to Nanjing, after lots of prayer and trying to work things out. He proposed on June 10. Mom, Dad, Brandon, and Amber came to visit in July and we traveled through the country. Started 2nd year at NEIS.
2008 - Wedding plans, with a wedding in Nanjing on May 3. We also visited the Philippines in February, then again in August. Started working on Raul's immigrant visa, knowing we wanted to move back to the US.
2009- The whirlwind year...which I recapped for you yesterday :)

So there ya have it. A lot happened this decade, and just trying to recap it all makes my head spin. But I'm thankful for what the years brought, how much the Lord blessed me, and I'm excited to see where the next 10 years might take us.

Here's to 2010!! And...Go Buckeyes! :)

where did 2009 go?

2009-12-30T10:59:00.002-05:00

In 28 years, I don't remember a year that went as fast as 2009 did. Honestly, I'm not sure what happened, but it flew by. Even the past 4 months (already?) in the US have flown by so quickly, I can hardly believe it. It was such a whirlwind year. I'd try to go month-by-month to recap everything that happened, but I honestly don't even remember those particulars, and I know I'll get them out of order...so I'll just make a list of the highlights for ya.

1. Raul's visa! This was the product of lots of hours spent sorting paperwork, trips to Shanghai, sending emails to the consulates, my parents, my uncle, other friends who'd been through the process, questioning if it was even the right decision, seeking counsel and advice, and praying our booties off for His will to be done. It all ended at the Guangzhou US consulate on June 22nd when Raul received his immigrant visa to the United States. The final point arrived when we stepped on American soil on August 26th.

2. Reading the Bible in 90 days! I wrote several blogs about this as I was going through it (see blogs January through March for a refresher). It was a life-changing experience for me. I saw the Word come alive right in front of me. The 90 days covered some key points in the process for Raul's visa, so our faith was tested and many prayers were answered. And on the the last of those 90 days, we had the biggest prayer request answered in the form of Raul's interview packet. I'm considering embarking on another 90 days in 2010...I hope I don't get too lazy and actually do it.

3. Saying goodbye to loved ones in Nanjing :( This was so hard, and something I'd dreaded not just for a couple months, but pretty much for my entire 5 years in China...since I really didn't know when it was going to happen (that whole "living year by year" thing). Thankfully, His grace just overflowed on us, and the goodbyes were much easier than I had anticipated. It doesn't mean I miss our NJ friends any less...there are days where I feel a big hole in my heart, left by friends there. But, like I said...that's when His grace overflows.

4. Meeting Sophia. I talked about my Chinese friend in limited terms on here (because I kinda had to), but she was a huge part of our last months in Nanjing. I haven't done a good job of keeping in touch with her since we left, unfortunately, and I'm so sad about that. But the time I spent with her left a huge impression on me and reminded me of the bigger picture of our time in China.

5. As a whole, spending time with my family in the US. So much happens in 5 years, on both sides, and you forget that when you're finally back. You forget that people and things in general change a lot in 5 years. But my family was and has been so accepting of us being back, of our situation, and has loved on Raul so much. I'm so thankful for a wonderful family.

6. Experiencing reverse culture shock. After just 5 years, I wondered if I would ever really feel "American" again. Having Raul to share my thoughts and feelings with definitely helped (and in some ways, I feel he adjusted better than I did...or he was just less vocal about his feelings, I'm not sure). But the transition has definitely had its weird, odd, "hmm" moments. In all, I'm still thankful to be American and proud of where I come from.

7. Getting a job. If you've read my blog in the past months, you know how much my new job has impacted me. I'm curious to see where it goes in 2010. But I'm thrilled that so late in 2009, I found a stable job and I actually like it! :) Go figure.

So that was 2009 ( I left out a lot, I'm sure). What will happen in 2010? I'm not quite sure, but I'm sure it will be a lot. He's got a lot of things in store for us.

weekend in Brown County

2009-12-29T10:32:00.002-05:00

Christmas weekend, Raul and I went with my parents to Brown County for the weekend. Well, first we stayed in Greenwood Saturday night, so we could spend time with Brandon and Amber before her parents went back to Arkansas. Then Sunday afternoon, we headed to Brown County...nothing says Happy 32nd Anniversary (belated) like spending the weekend with your daughter and son-in-law, but it was really nice of my parents to let us tag along. :) We stayed at the Abe Martin Lodge in the state park and enjoyed the huge snowfall on Sunday and Monday. It was a really beautiful couple of days, maybe even prettier than when we were there in the fall.

my parents...at a Nashville restaurant on Sunday

walking around Nashville, snow falling all around
pretty deer in the snow :) this was the second deer sighting for the weekend, but the only time we were able to get photos

the covered bridge at the entrance to the park

a blessed Christmas

2009-12-26T20:40:00.004-05:00

Raul and I had a really great first Christmas in the US. After a busy week of baking and making all kinds of fun Christmasy goodies, I was ready for the actual holiday :) I only have this one photo because all the others were downloaded directly to facebook, then I deleted them :p so you have to go to facebook to see them.

For Christmas Eve, Brandon, Amber, and Amber's parents (who had come up from Arkansas) came to the house for dinner, a trip to Marion's Christmas walkway, and Christmas stockings.

Raul was the first-timer, so he had to experience the humiliation :) He actually loves it and has worn it quite a bit since Thursday night...says it's really warm. You can't see the whole effect, but it has dog ears, antlers, and a santa hat...the whole package ;)

For Christmas day, we headed to Brandon and Amber's place for Christmas lunch and opening gifts. After lunch, Raul and I went with Mom and Dad to see "Nine"...our second movie since being home (saw "The Blindside" the weekend before, really good movie).

After spending 9 months working on Raul's visa and praying it would all come through in time for us to be home for the holidays...the Father provided a way. And we are so incredibly thankful!

Christmas spirit

2009-12-21T18:47:00.002-05:00

This thought had been running through my head for the past few weeks, but I had yet to voice it to anyone until yesterday when I told Raul after my dad's chorale concert.

I've had a reverse culture shock when it comes to getting ready for Christmas. Just because I can, I feel the need to do everything to get into the Christmas spirit. On Thanksgiving, I decided that I wanted to make Christmas cookies from scratch (huuuge for me) and bought all sorts of fun decorations that day. I was so eager, that I didn't realize I wouldn't have time to make them until I was on Christmas break. So for almost a month, these decorations stared at me, torturing me. I also bought gingerbread men sets for me and Raul to decorate. I got ahead on my Christmas shopping and just couldn't help myself with all the things I wanted to buy for everyone right away. Again, the bags of gifts sat in our bedroom, staring at me. I wanted the receivers to open them right away, but I knew I'd have to wait several more weeks.

With all the Christmas music and programs, I've also gotten excited. It's been amazing to watch Christmas movie after Christmas movie on my parents' dvr, watch Christmas specials on tv, listen to Christmas music on the radio..so many options.

So...so far, you might ask "So, why is this weird?" Well, first off, Christmas is my favorite holiday, next to Thanksgiving. But, after living in a country that doesn't recognize Christmas as a holiday, only uses it for commercial reasons (if that), and working either on or around the holiday for 5 years, I lost the Christmas spirit. There were a couple years when I hardly felt that Christmas was coming. And were it not for NICF's Christmas dinners, Christmas would have felt like just another day. In addition, I was single for most of those 5 years, so not having a family to spend the holiday with definitely dampens your spirit.

Putting all that into perspective, I guess it's no surprise that some of the spirit was lost for me. But then, being back in the US with my husband, living with my parents, being able to spend the holiday with my family... the spirit has come back, almost to the point where I'm like a little girl again :) I love seeing houses decorated for the holidays (even the god-awful tacky ones), I love spending 4 hours making, cutting, and decorating dozens of Christmas cookies. I love hearing store clerks and even strangers say "Merry Christmas" to each other. I love hearing Christmas music on the radio (Christian station or not). All of it just makes me smile.

Just one of the many reasons I'm happy to be home this time of year.

few photos

2009-12-20T22:00:00.002-05:00

some photos...

Sunday service at Bethel Center, December 20

2nd snow of the season :)

praise report

2009-12-14T18:15:00.003-05:00

Being the last week of school before break and feeling like I want to pull out my hair after an off-on sort of day, I'll make this short...still promising that I'll write more once we're on vacation.

I have felt y'all's prayers so very much, even the prayers that I know my dear friends have sent all the way from Nanjing. It's blessed my heart so much. I can report that I do officially have a job. :) I'm no longer "just" a substitute teacher, but a permanent fixture in the life skills classroom. Unfortunately, I'm not considered full-time, so I'm denied the benefits of full-time...but you know what? It's all good. This is the way He wants it, and I couldn't be more thankful. At this time, the school board cannot post the position as full-time, simply wanting to keep it as a substitute teacher position. Well...I've been there 2 months, so why not stay? I told Destiny and the principal that I really feel this is His timing. I have incredible peace about it and know that it's no coincidence that my first day back in the US education system that I ended up in that classroom. This is where He wants me, and He's asking me to wait just a little bit longer for the rest. I can wait. Raul and I have had nothing but blessings fall on us in the almost 4 months we've been in the US, so there's no reason to complain. I didn't expect to find something so permanent right away, with the current situation and financial crisis...and then this happened. I just...yeah, it's working out the way it's supposed to. So thank you all for praying and continue to keep me (and Raul) in your prayers.

a real blog post?

2009-12-09T18:31:00.002-05:00

I know it's been awhile since I've written anything incredibly interesting, but the time still isn't here. Sorry. I'm sure you're disappointed. Probably when we're on Christmas break after next week. But I will let you know that there's still no update on what's happening with my job. I'm still praying and asking that it will become full-time, but it's slow-going. Hopefully before we leave for break, I'll know something at least somewhat definitive.

And I'm still enjoying the job. There are days (well, probably most) where my favorite thing about it are the teachers I work with, but I still think it's all worth it for the "education" that I get. We have had a lot of frustration the past few days, probably due to the "quiet" week we had last week when 3 students were out sick nearly all week then all of them coming back at once and bringing a different vibe...bringing out the teachers' grumpy sides and impatience. There is a fine line between disciplining the students and just plain getting mad. I know I've struggled with that line. I'm trying my hardest, but goodness...when a student refuses to listen, is disrespectful, and will not be quiet? Oooooh, I struggle...and I know I'm not the only one. Call it "Christmas fever" I guess. We just need a vacation.

Well, maybe this was a real post...more about the continuous adjustment to American life to come later.

Christmas questions

2009-12-08T15:59:00.002-05:00

A little Christmas list for you:

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? as a former customer service worker and gift-wrapper at Elder-Beerman...I'll be lazy and say gift bags :)

2. Real tree or Artificial? never in my life had a real one, so I have no idea

3. When do you put up the tree? in Nanjing, I did it on Thanksgiving, since I couldn't really celebrate the holiday. here...we did it this past weekend

5. Do you like eggnog? what happend to 4? and no, I don't :p yuck

6. Favorite gift received as a child? I honestly don't know...you might have to ask my parents what their favorite reaction was :)

7. Hardest person to buy for? parents, my brother and my sister-in-law...I've been gone too long :p

8. Easiest person to buy for? Raul

9. Do you have a nativity scene? yes. Raul and I got one as a wedding gift from David Welch...made from olive wood in Bethlehem. it's awesome

10. Mail or email Christmas cards? in Nanjing I did a mix of both. here, I'm doing all snail mail or in person

11. Worst Christmas gift you ever received? don't think I've ever received a bad one

12. Favorite Christmas Movie? too many...Elf, Christmas Story, Small One (Christmas cartoon...if you haven't seen it, you're missing out!), and even Home Alone is on the list

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? after Thanksgiving I guess

14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? probably? ;)

15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? cherry cordial Hershey's kisses

16. Lights on the tree? yes! I prefer white

17. Favorite Christmas song? I love the song "Joy" by Selah, and "O Holy Night" (who doesn't?)

18. Travel at Christmas or stay home? haven't really traveled much for it since I was a kid...

19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer? yep...Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen, and Rudolph

20. Angel on the tree top or a star? not sure what I prefer...probably an angel

21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? stockings Christmas Eve, presents Christmas Day

22. Most annoying thing about this time of the year? how people get so caught up decorating and shopping and forget what the season is really about

23. Favorite ornament theme or color? I love silver and blue or purple

24. Favorite thing for Christmas dinner? I haven't had a real one in awhile...I'll let you know ;)

25. What do you want for Christmas this year? just to be near my family is good enough for me!

Dulcie Whitmore | A Dog Named Christmas

2009-11-30T17:22:00.001-05:00

Dulcie Whitmore | A Dog Named Christmas

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a very happy Thanksgiving weekend

2009-11-29T20:03:00.003-05:00

It's been awhile since I've written much. Sorry about that :(

After a really hectic, bit frustrating at times week and a half of school, everyone in the Life Skills room (particularly the teachers) was ready for a break in the form of a 4-day weekend. The fact that it was Thanksgiving? Even better :) After 6 years away from a traditional American celebration, I was thrilled to be with my family. Not to take away from the great celebration in Spain in 2003 or the great years at the Prenevosts' Thanksgiving, but doing it in the States...priceless. You enjoy it so much more, too...every little thing. We arrived at my Aunt Cindy's house in Columbus where my brother already was (we missed Amber, who was in Arkansas with her family), and watched the Macy's parade while more relatives arrived and lunch was finishing. By the way, I made my "famous" mashed potatoes again :) Lunch was fabulous, as was spending time with my relatives. Raul tried to tell us he was full after just one plate, but we knew better...there's no way you can be full after just one plate at Thanksgiving. Alas, he had more :)

After a little shopping at a couple nearby stores that happened to be open, we celebrated my cousin Jenn's birthday(conveniently on Thanksgiving), my great-uncle Everett's birthday (last Tuesday), and Raul's birthday (this coming Tuesday)...then it was back to Indiana. A long, but great great day.

The extent of mine and Raul's contribution to Black Friday was Dollar General in Fairmount (hehe), but we shopped with Mom and Brandon in Indy on Saturday. We also enjoyed some dinner at the Hard Rock Cafe and the Christmas lights on Monument Circle...a gorgeous night.

As we head into the Christmas season, I couldn't be happier to be home. Even as I talked to Nanjingren yesterday (NICFers at the Prenevosts and Michelle and Jodie on skype), and I did miss them...I was also happy to be home in the US.

Footprints in the Sand

2009-11-25T18:27:00.001-05:00

singing at Bethel Center Church, November 22

Hershey's Kisses Commercial

2009-11-24T16:20:00.001-05:00

Don't laugh at me...but last night, I saw this commercial for the first time in 5 years and I cried a little bit. It's one of my favorite commercials, always makes me smile, and last night, it made me teary-eyed. Like my coworker Kerri said this morning, if you've lived away from home a long time, it's something only you can understand. Thanks for not laughing at me, Kerri :)

on my mind...

2009-11-17T17:50:00.003-05:00

I haven't posted much lately, but here are the things on my mind lately. It's a very random list.

~ Christmas gifts are more complicated when I can't just head to fuzimiao or fashion lady for quick buys that usually included Chinese souvenirs. I think I've figured out some things for my parents, but my bro and sis-in-law and husband are proving to be more complicated. Hopefully a shopping trip this weekend in Indy will clear some things up for me.

~ The patience of some people just astounds me, the teacher I'm currently working with, for example. She's such a wonderful person, too. I often find myself asking, while I'm in the classroom and working with a student, "What would Destini do?" She's a gift to work with. If this job doesn't work out as full-time, I'll be sad that I have to stop working with her.

~I'm praying I don't get sick. The classroom is a germ factory with sinus infections and flu going around. Lovely. Thankfully, so far my stuff is only allergy-induced (of course), and hopefully that's getting better as the weather stays (fingers crossed) cold. But the constant sickness of students (yet still being in school) doesn't help a lot, especially when they don't know how to cover their mouths when they cough or sneeze. Well, some do, but they choose to ignore it. Yucky. So far, I'm just exhausted from 2 days where the other 2 aides have been sick and I feel like I've done the work of 2 people.

~ Really looking forward to some snow soon. After hearing that Nanjing, which hardly ever gets snow, much less in November, had snow 2 days ago, I was more than ready for some in Indiana. Hopefully soon...

~ Remember that weird stomach flu thing I had the week before we left Nanjing in August? Well, after reading an email that compares the common cold to H1N1, my mom, myself, and even Jamie are convinced my little sickness was H1N1. Lovely.

2009-11-11T17:46:00.002-05:00

I haven't had the chance yet, but when I do, I plan to say a big thank you to the principal of the elementary school. Today was Grandparents Day in the morning, Veterans Day in the afternoon. After a pretty stressful morning in our room, I was struggling to find something to take the tension away. In the afternoon, another teacher and I took some of the students to the Veterans Day program, with performances by the high school band and the elementary school's choir. During the national anthem, I was a bit emotional, but it was when the band played "God Bless the USA" and got to the part "and I'm proud to be an American, where at least I know I'm free", I lost it. This day is definitely about veterans, but for us expats who've lived overseas for a different reason...it has a lot of meaning, too. Not sure if I mentioned it before, but the first time I heard the national anthem when we got back (I think at an Indy Indians game), I cried. And today, I cried again...not a basketcase, but definitely some tears. I'm just so thankful to be home, thankful to be in a free country, thankful for the blessings we have as a nation, and grateful and thankful for the men and women who died to protect this nation and our freedoms.

And on this veterans day, I think of my cousin Hallie who is headed back overseas to serve again. I love you, hon, and I'm praying for you.

by His grace

2009-11-03T20:46:00.002-05:00

Grace is one of those words that I've always loved, but to be honest...I never really felt I understood the extent of it until the past week. Day after day, He reminds me that it's only by His grace that I'm here. Without Him, I would've collapsed on the floor, weak, poor, tired, and utterly at a loss for words. The situation really seemed utterly devastating. Though it wasn't anywhere near that extreme, after 2 months of being in the US living by His grace, I felt it slip away. Maybe my theology is wrong here, but I felt that He was taking away just a bit to see how I would do. Well, I crashed and burned. I had several bursts of tears, some longer than others, many teary-eyed moments, and lots of hugs of support from my husband and family. I really struggled to figure out where He was. I knew He was there, I knew it in my heart, but it felt so good to just let out my frustration, my questions, and just...cry.
His grace is always there. Today as I talked with a very sweet teacher, who really, genuinely wanted to know how I was doing, it hit me what has gotten me through everything...she was asking about my days in the Life Skills class...and inside, I was thinking about everything bad that has frustrated me lately. His grace is sufficient for me. It's the only thing that will get me through the tough times, the reverse culture shock, the loss I sometimes feel when I miss people in NJ, and many other things I may face. But I have to remember that in addition to His grace, I'm not alone. I have a wonderful husband who supports me in everything I do, a family that loves me and has never given up on me, and friends who also love and care about me (though some may be very far away). I am blessed.

Father, thank You for Your endless love and grace that abounds.

on a Tuesday

2009-10-27T18:45:00.003-04:00

I have so many things I want to blog about, mostly having to do with the classroom I've been working with lately, but I'm nowhere near qualified to write my opinions on a public blog where things could be misunderstood. But I will say that I'm still learning so much from this job. It's not a full-time job, since I'm still technically a substitute. However, it has turned into a long-term thing (not sure how long a long-term thing is at this point), and I'm in the classroom on a daily basis.
Several teachers at the school have approached me and wondered if I'm in the position permanently, and I tell them no, but that I'm happy to be there. I often get looks of sympathy, understanding, and sometimes even a bit of a "wow, better you than me" look. But I really do love it. This morning, a 6th grade teacher was talking to me about how her sister, the most impatient person she knew, had accepted a job at a local center for disabled people. God had turned it into a situation where she learned patience firsthand and how to love on people. I would say that I'm learning that as well. I came back to the States, thinking maybe I'd be in a comfort zone (though going through reverse culture shock), but we all know that He has a sense of humor...and I was called to help out with these special students. And, what's more, I'm loving it.
There are definitely difficult moments. Though I'm happy there, it's not always easy...but it doesn't come in moments where I want to pull my hair out, it's when I just don't understand the home lives of some students, their behavior, and what they put on the teachers. This is where my inexperience comes in, but you don't have to be an expert to see the difficulties. In the meantime, I do what I can, offer suggestions when I can, and mostly observe and learn. I love the teacher and aides I work with. Our teacher has the most incredible patience, plus a firm but tender spirit. That's hard to find in people. And I've discovered that I want to be more like her. She's younger than me, fresh out of college, but someone I've learned so much from. She makes me want to be a better teacher.

Hodge podge of a blog today, but that's where my head is.